Baby Shaker – It’s Not Funny Apple!

(update: app has been removed – CLICK HERE for details)

Our apologies in advance – this will not be a typical KRAPPS post. To borrow a baseball analogy, our mission is to hit what Apple tees up and this next one is going out of the park.

Ever hear of SBS? Per Wikipedia … “Shaken Baby Syndrome (SBS) is a form of child abuse that occurs when an abuser violently shakes an infant, creating a whiplash-type motion that causes acceleration-deceleration injuries. The injury is estimated to affect between 1,200 and 1,600 children every year in the USA. SBS is often fatal and can cause severe brain damage, resulting in lifelong disability.” Besides death and brain damage, shaking a baby can cause blindness, leaning problems, seizure disorders, cerebral palsy and paralysis. Yeah, pretty disgusting stuff … repulsive and sickening.

So obviously child abuse is no laughing matter … and maybe it’s just us, but we would never even joke about child abuse and use it as a form of entertainment. Maybe we’re just square pegs and out of the norm because apparently Apple and the folks at Sikalosoft think shaking a baby is funny. Head to the App Store … and search the Entertainment category … there you will find the Baby Shaker iPhone app.

BabyShakerDesc

Now don’t get us wrong – we’re not on some vigilante justice hunt. We know there was no malicious intent by Sikalosoft. And we know that Apple are complete dumbasses when it comes to approving apps (even if the app includes a disclaimer – “Never, never shake a baby”), driven by quantity over quality. But come one … combining the title Baby Shaker with the objective of stopping an annoying crying baby is simply irresponsible and utterly idiotic. You would think Apple would stay totally clear of any iPhone app remotely resembling child abuse … but if you’ve paid any attention to KRAPPS, it’s really not surprising.

BabyShake1 BabyShake2 BabyShake3

loser Ok, we get it … crying babies can indeed get annoying. On a plane, at a restaurant, in the hotel room next to yours … we get it, annoying … shut that kid up! But Apple, try using just half your freaking money-making brain and reject Baby Shaker … tell Sikalosoft to make some revisions, call the damn thing Pacify Junior and mix in some pacifiers to calm the baby down. See how easy that was … simple stuff, sort of funny while protecting the integrity of the Apple brand. And never forget … reality bites – release Baby Shaker and you get douchebag users leaving loser reviews like the one below (yeah, look for it … look for the word CHOCKING) …

ShakeBabyComment

Comments

  • Satire Rules

    I see no one in the comment's section nor the article writer understands the concept of fantasy satire?

  • Satire Rules

    I see no one in the comment's section nor the article writer understands the concept of fantasy satire?

  • Satire Rules

    I see no one in the comment's section nor the article writer understands the concept of fantasy satire?

  • Satire Rules

    I see no one in the comment's section nor the article writer understands the concept of fantasy satire?

  • Satire Rules

    I see no one in the comment's section nor the article writer understands the concept of fantasy satire?

  • Satire Rules

    I see no one in the comment's section nor the article writer understands the concept of fantasy satire?

  • Satire Rules

    I see no one in the comment's section nor the article writer understands the concept of fantasy satire?

  • Satire Rules

    I see no one in the comment's section nor the article writer understands the concept of fantasy satire?

  • Satire Rules

    I see no one in the comment's section nor the article writer understands the concept of fantasy satire?

  • Satire Rules

    I see no one in the comment's section nor the article writer understands the concept of fantasy satire?

  • Satire Rules

    I see no one in the comment's section nor the article writer understands the concept of fantasy satire?

  • Satire Rules

    I see no one in the comment's section nor the article writer understands the concept of fantasy satire?

  • Lafonda

    hmm. well, thought it was funny..

  • Lafonda

    hmm. well, thought it was funny..

  • Lafonda

    hmm. well, thought it was funny..

  • Lafonda

    hmm. well, thought it was funny..

  • Lafonda

    hmm. well, thought it was funny..

  • Lafonda

    hmm. well, thought it was funny..

  • Lafonda

    hmm. well, thought it was funny..

  • Lafonda

    hmm. well, thought it was funny..

  • Lafonda

    hmm. well, thought it was funny..

  • Lafonda

    hmm. well, thought it was funny..

  • Lafonda

    hmm. well, thought it was funny..

  • Lafonda

    hmm. well, thought it was funny..

  • Lafonda

    hmm. well, thought it was funny..

  • Lafonda

    hmm. well, thought it was funny..

  • Lafonda

    hmm. well, thought it was funny..

  • Lafonda

    hmm. well, thought it was funny..

  • Lafonda

    LMAO, the watermelon joke is hilarious.
    I seriously laughed out loud.

  • Lafonda

    LMAO, the watermelon joke is hilarious.
    I seriously laughed out loud.

  • Lafonda

    LMAO, the watermelon joke is hilarious.
    I seriously laughed out loud.

  • Lafonda

    LMAO, the watermelon joke is hilarious.
    I seriously laughed out loud.

  • Lafonda

    LMAO, the watermelon joke is hilarious.
    I seriously laughed out loud.

  • Lafonda

    LMAO, the watermelon joke is hilarious.
    I seriously laughed out loud.

  • Lafonda

    LMAO, the watermelon joke is hilarious.
    I seriously laughed out loud.

  • Lafonda

    LMAO, the watermelon joke is hilarious.
    I seriously laughed out loud.

  • Lafonda

    LMAO, the watermelon joke is hilarious.
    I seriously laughed out loud.

  • Lafonda

    LMAO, the watermelon joke is hilarious.
    I seriously laughed out loud.

  • Lafonda

    LMAO, the watermelon joke is hilarious.
    I seriously laughed out loud.

  • Lafonda

    LMAO, the watermelon joke is hilarious.
    I seriously laughed out loud.

  • Lafonda

    LMAO, the watermelon joke is hilarious.
    I seriously laughed out loud.

  • Lafonda

    LMAO, the watermelon joke is hilarious.
    I seriously laughed out loud.

  • Lafonda

    LMAO, the watermelon joke is hilarious.
    I seriously laughed out loud.

  • Lafonda

    LMAO, the watermelon joke is hilarious.
    I seriously laughed out loud.

  • nike

    interesting how all you people say: I will never buy any apple products again!
    Yes , i completely agree this was an app which should have never been on the app store in the first place. And SBS is a serious matter. This is not entirely Apple's fault, nor should Apple be seen any different from this incident. First, Apple has do deal with thousands of applications a day, updating them, adding new ones, checking for reliability, playability, saftey, and so on. This is not the first app that was allowed to be put on the app store and broke the rules or offended people. Apple realized it was hugely understaffed in the app store department, and have since been hiring more and more people to monitor all apps for any problems including offensive, explicit, and improper matters.

    I would understand a mistake like this could happen, and did, but this does not make the company bad or morally wrong!!! Microsoft has published numerous improper software and games, but nothing happens to them, Apple gets shot at things like this. Yes, the app was never supposed to be published, but due to understaffed employees and numerous applications being downloaded, added, and/or updated, something like this was bound to happen. Apple is still one of the best electronic companies in the world, and this incident does not affect my judgment of the company, NOR SHOULD IT AFFECT YOURS!!!!

  • nike

    interesting how all you people say: I will never buy any apple products again!
    Yes , i completely agree this was an app which should have never been on the app store in the first place. And SBS is a serious matter. This is not entirely Apple's fault, nor should Apple be seen any different from this incident. First, Apple has do deal with thousands of applications a day, updating them, adding new ones, checking for reliability, playability, saftey, and so on. This is not the first app that was allowed to be put on the app store and broke the rules or offended people. Apple realized it was hugely understaffed in the app store department, and have since been hiring more and more people to monitor all apps for any problems including offensive, explicit, and improper matters.

    I would understand a mistake like this could happen, and did, but this does not make the company bad or morally wrong!!! Microsoft has published numerous improper software and games, but nothing happens to them, Apple gets shot at things like this. Yes, the app was never supposed to be published, but due to understaffed employees and numerous applications being downloaded, added, and/or updated, something like this was bound to happen. Apple is still one of the best electronic companies in the world, and this incident does not affect my judgment of the company, NOR SHOULD IT AFFECT YOURS!!!!

  • nike

    interesting how all you people say: I will never buy any apple products again!
    Yes , i completely agree this was an app which should have never been on the app store in the first place. And SBS is a serious matter. This is not entirely Apple's fault, nor should Apple be seen any different from this incident. First, Apple has do deal with thousands of applications a day, updating them, adding new ones, checking for reliability, playability, saftey, and so on. This is not the first app that was allowed to be put on the app store and broke the rules or offended people. Apple realized it was hugely understaffed in the app store department, and have since been hiring more and more people to monitor all apps for any problems including offensive, explicit, and improper matters.

    I would understand a mistake like this could happen, and did, but this does not make the company bad or morally wrong!!! Microsoft has published numerous improper software and games, but nothing happens to them, Apple gets shot at things like this. Yes, the app was never supposed to be published, but due to understaffed employees and numerous applications being downloaded, added, and/or updated, something like this was bound to happen. Apple is still one of the best electronic companies in the world, and this incident does not affect my judgment of the company, NOR SHOULD IT AFFECT YOURS!!!!

  • nike

    interesting how all you people say: I will never buy any apple products again!
    Yes , i completely agree this was an app which should have never been on the app store in the first place. And SBS is a serious matter. This is not entirely Apple's fault, nor should Apple be seen any different from this incident. First, Apple has do deal with thousands of applications a day, updating them, adding new ones, checking for reliability, playability, saftey, and so on. This is not the first app that was allowed to be put on the app store and broke the rules or offended people. Apple realized it was hugely understaffed in the app store department, and have since been hiring more and more people to monitor all apps for any problems including offensive, explicit, and improper matters.

    I would understand a mistake like this could happen, and did, but this does not make the company bad or morally wrong!!! Microsoft has published numerous improper software and games, but nothing happens to them, Apple gets shot at things like this. Yes, the app was never supposed to be published, but due to understaffed employees and numerous applications being downloaded, added, and/or updated, something like this was bound to happen. Apple is still one of the best electronic companies in the world, and this incident does not affect my judgment of the company, NOR SHOULD IT AFFECT YOURS!!!!

  • nike

    interesting how all you people say: I will never buy any apple products again!
    Yes , i completely agree this was an app which should have never been on the app store in the first place. And SBS is a serious matter. This is not entirely Apple's fault, nor should Apple be seen any different from this incident. First, Apple has do deal with thousands of applications a day, updating them, adding new ones, checking for reliability, playability, saftey, and so on. This is not the first app that was allowed to be put on the app store and broke the rules or offended people. Apple realized it was hugely understaffed in the app store department, and have since been hiring more and more people to monitor all apps for any problems including offensive, explicit, and improper matters.

    I would understand a mistake like this could happen, and did, but this does not make the company bad or morally wrong!!! Microsoft has published numerous improper software and games, but nothing happens to them, Apple gets shot at things like this. Yes, the app was never supposed to be published, but due to understaffed employees and numerous applications being downloaded, added, and/or updated, something like this was bound to happen. Apple is still one of the best electronic companies in the world, and this incident does not affect my judgment of the company, NOR SHOULD IT AFFECT YOURS!!!!

  • nike

    interesting how all you people say: I will never buy any apple products again!
    Yes , i completely agree this was an app which should have never been on the app store in the first place. And SBS is a serious matter. This is not entirely Apple's fault, nor should Apple be seen any different from this incident. First, Apple has do deal with thousands of applications a day, updating them, adding new ones, checking for reliability, playability, saftey, and so on. This is not the first app that was allowed to be put on the app store and broke the rules or offended people. Apple realized it was hugely understaffed in the app store department, and have since been hiring more and more people to monitor all apps for any problems including offensive, explicit, and improper matters.

    I would understand a mistake like this could happen, and did, but this does not make the company bad or morally wrong!!! Microsoft has published numerous improper software and games, but nothing happens to them, Apple gets shot at things like this. Yes, the app was never supposed to be published, but due to understaffed employees and numerous applications being downloaded, added, and/or updated, something like this was bound to happen. Apple is still one of the best electronic companies in the world, and this incident does not affect my judgment of the company, NOR SHOULD IT AFFECT YOURS!!!!