The Keynote Blows – We Have Real News

Ok, so yesterday Apple announced some really cool stuff in their 2009 WWDC Keynote …

WWDC2009Badge11 OS 3.0 will be released on June 17. The new iPhone 3GS will become available on June 19 at $199 (16GB) and $299 (32GB) … improved battery life, a 3MP camera with autofocus, video recording, voice commands, a digital compass, cut-copy-paste functionality and a whole lot more. Oh – and the new “S” in 3GS … it stands for sexy … meaning your iPhone will be twice as sexy. Kidding … S = Speed … 3GS is 2x faster than the iPhone 3G.

att-logoSUCKS11 Good times – yeah, whatever. Let’s get to the best part of the Keynote … AT&T SUCKS and KRAPPS on their iPhone customers! Basically AT&T is not ready to support MMS or Internet Tethering … and the announced prices are only for eligible customers. Great work AT&T – you guys rock! Visit 148apps for more details about the AT&T SUCKS issue … and be sure to check out Apple’s excellent Guided Tour video of the new 3GS.

But remember – this is KRAPPS and the beauty of KRAPPS is that we’re not iPhone Alley, 148apps, Just Another iPhone Blog or any one of those polished and professional iPhone news sites. We are freaks … so while the rest of the iPhone fan-boy blog world is getting all hot and bothered over Apple’s latest and greatest achievements… we skim that page and focus on the real news. So what’s making our kite fly high today? Well it’s the latest sack of suck we discovered –> the Bathroom Racer app!

BathroomRacerTitle

Damn straight … Bathroom Racer … the new iPhone racing game where you drive a PILE of POOP! Fastest time to the toilet wins. That’s what we’re talking about … POOP RACING … challenging courses with hills and jumps (hey, it’s not easy to control flying poop), five ridiculously thrilling levels of poop play and kindergarten-like graphics . Heck with Firemint and their Real Racing garbage … this is the real REAL RACING … this is POOP RACING. For a flavor of Poop Racing’s awesomeness, check out the amazing action-packed screen shots below:

BathroomRacerFly11  BathroomRacerHills11

BathroomRacerUpsideDown11  BathroomRacerStuck11

So to all you fan-boys … go ahead and keep blowing sunshine up Apple’s ass for their “fastest, most powerful iPhone yet”. We’re not buying into that nonsense! We’re buying Bathroom Racer for 99 cents and applauding developer Adam Flaherty for his groundbreaking achievement … the world’s first POOP RACING game … because here at KRAPPS, we realize POOP RACING is a privilege, not a right!

June 9, 2009 | Filed Under Games, News 

Comments