New iPhone App Proves Sex Doesn’t Always Sell

It’s a given – sex sells. Pretty simple stuff … anyone can do it. Get an assortment of smoking hot chick pictures, mix in some titillating words (erotic, exotic, luscious, explicit content, scantily-clad, etc.) … and voila, you completed the sex sells equation.

But despite the worldwide appeal of sex and the fact that a monkey could sell it, a few bozos still manage to screw up. Case in point, the Best Cute Leg app by 1Games …

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Close but no cigar. We would give some consideration to the plural of this app … Best Cute LegSSSS, but even then, something about being released as a woman during a lonely nice night really disturbs us.

So, no thank you! We’ll just go ahead and stick to the thousands of good old fashioned iPhone smut selections available for download … like the Tight Body Perky Boobs app … doesn’t get any simpler than that.

tight-body-perky-boobs-titl

February 16, 2010 | Filed Under Entertainment, Lifestyle | 6 Comments 

Let’s Bounce – SpringFling iPhone Game Review

(written by guest author Connor Coghlan. follow Connor on Twitter @Condawg)

Since I can’t really describe the genre of this iPhone game, I have to make a comparison.  Ah, I’ve got it … Spring Fling [iTunes $0.99] is like Doodle Jump, but with a bouncy twist.

SpringFling1  SpringFling2

Instead of being instantly propelled upward by each platform as you land on it, you have to pull down on your spring (which can be done anywhere on the screen) to decide the power and direction that you will launch. This gives you more overall control and allows you to guide yourself toward powerups and whatnot with more precision.

There are two kinds of levels … static and scrolling. The static levels allow you as much time as you need to figure out where to go and what to do. The scrolling levels put a bit of a time limit on the endeavor by auto-scrolling upward, making sure you act fast to avoid slipping off the screen. This feature adds a unique challenge and some frustration <banging head against the wall>.

SpringFling3  SpringFling4

There are powerups within SpringFling … a pogo-stick, balloons or fans that pop up at the bottom of the screen to blow you back up if you fall too low. But there are also pickups, which, unlike powerups, are permanent. Pickups affect your character aesthetically, so they don’t effect gameplay, but I’ll be damned if they’re not a boatload of fun to collect.

You can pick up different hats, faces, and eye pieces (some are glasses, some are just eyes) for your character to wear. This adds a good bit of replay value, as you try to unlock ’em all. Plus online leaderboards and Facebook / Twitter integration makes SpringFling even more addictive.

SpringFling5  SpringFling6

Although Doodle Jump is more popular, I personally prefer SpringFling. I like the extra control that you get and I love the pickups available. Published by indie game developers GTProduction, SpringFling is in no way krappy … it’s one of the few anti-KRAPPS we feature here at KRAPPS and has Konnor’s (that’s me) Kredential. For only 99 cents, give it a try, you won’t be sorry.

 

February 15, 2010 | Filed Under anti-KRAPPS, Games, Guest Authors | 6 Comments 

Recap: Week Of February 8 – plus Site That Features Paid Apps Gone Free

iphone3g krapps 2 In case you missed any of our perfect iPhone chaos, quick links to this week’s articles.

February 8: Exclusive – Peyton Manning Seen Using iPhone App During Super Bowl

February 9: Celebrate Self-Mutilation With The Rate My Piercing App

February 10: Sports Smut – The Latest App Store Sexploitation

February 11: Apple Continues War On Smut – Apps Rejected Due To Screenshots

February 12: Addicted To Porn? These Apps Can Help You Recover

February 13: Gotta Catch A Mall! – Create A Mall iPhone Game

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Free iPhone Apps @ Free App A Day
We love a great deal and if you follow us on Twitter, you know we dig informing our followers about paid iPhone apps that have gone free. One of our followers has a running count on the number of apps she downloaded for free due to our tweets … 258 apps … dang, great savings!

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These free apps are typically for a limited amount of time (usually 24 hours) … so you have to jump on them fast. Now obviously there’s a lot of crap that goes free, but we don’t tweet those … no sense in wasting anyone’s time.

A great resource for finding quality free apps is a new site called FreeAppaDay.com … just like it sounds … working with developers, every day these guys post an app that is free for 24 hours. The beauty of FreeAppaDay is the review process. Before an app is featured on the site, it must be approved, thus ensuring quality apps (usually having at least 20 reviews and a 3 star rating). For example, today’s free app is Navy Patrol Coastal Defense … a kick ass tower defense game that is normally $4.99 … SWEEEET!

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So be sure to check out FreeAppaDay … every day. And if you have trouble remembering things, they have a nifty opt-in reminder email so you’ll never miss any of their killer deals.

February 14, 2010 | Filed Under Recap | 2 Comments 

Gotta Catch A Mall! – Create A Mall iPhone Game

(written by guest author Tim Giron. follow Tim on Twitter @timgiron)

Economic goal type apps are all the rage at my house, so I knew that Create A Mall [iTunes $3.99] by 99 Games would get a good workout.  In this game, you play Kelly, who is a mall management superstar, tasked with turning poor performing shopping slums into mega merchandising meccas (in six different cities, no less).  At your disposal are cash, resources and building plans which you must use in pursuit of a particular goal.  The first three levels act as a tutorial, setting the foundation for success.  Sometimes the goal is to attain a certain popularity rating, sometimes it’s to generate a certain amount of cash per day, sometimes it’s to put together a specific combination of stores.  Each level presents a new set of challenges.

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By achieving the goal within the specified time limit, you’ll be awarded the expert ribbon and you can also revisit any level that you’ve previously cleared to try for a better score.  One sure sign that the goals are decently challenging: my wife didn’t clear the whole board the first day she tried the game.  The logic puzzle side of things appealed to me as well.  Some of the goals require careful use of the tools at hand to finish within the expert deadline.

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In one of the first levels, you are tasked with attracting more shoppers to a rundown mall.  Why is it currently unpopular?  Well, the previous management thought it would be a good idea to build two of the same store right next to each other (for some reason, a pair of Abercrombies in close proximity turns people away).  The first task then is to "ditch a Fitch" and demolish one of them to make way for something else like, you know, an Aeropostale or a Hot Topic.  Yeah, that’ll bring in the hordes, ready to part with their cash.  Add in an upscale shoe store and you’ve got it made.

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As you progress through the 30 levels, you’ll gain access to new kinds of stores and accumulate points to spend on decorations for Kelly’s office or new clothes, shoes and jewelry.  She works hard, she deserves a little bling now and then!

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For your $3.99 [iTunes] initial investment, you’ll get hours of goal-seeking, mall-building entertainment with local and global leaderboards to let you match your skills against others.

February 13, 2010 | Filed Under anti-KRAPPS, Games, Guest Authors | 15 Comments 

Addicted To Porn? These Apps Can Help You Recover

As previously reported, we’ve been closely following Apple’s all-out attempt at clearing the App Store of smut apps. In late December, without any warnings, Apple reversed its policy and began removing once approved sexy hot chick apps that showed too much skin (pasties, hand bras, etc.). Then just this week, Apple began rejecting apps due to inappropriate preview screenshots… stating they must meet the requirements for a 4+ rating (suitable for ages 4 and above).

And there’s an additional, albeit indirect approach … a pair of iPhone apps that help users battle their addiction to pornography.

Biblical Encouragement – Pornography Addiction
Published by WorldLink Apps, per the app’s description … “this application provides encouraging Bible verses for the myriad of emotions and symptoms associated with pornography addiction”. And not only is this app quite popular (breaking into the Health & Fitness category’s Top 50 in the UK … but still not in the US Top 300), Biblical Encouragement – Pornography Addiction seems to be reaching its target market. According to AppShopper’s “Customers Also Bought” feature, users who purchased  Pornography Addiction also downloaded Epic Boob, Sexy Girls and Sex Jokes.

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biblical-1  biblical-2

iRecover – Pornography Addiction Recovery
While Biblical Encouragement provides, well, encouragement to battle your porn addiction … iRecover takes a bit of a different approach. From the get go, the app cuts through the bullshit and bluntly states … “For those of you who are ready to overcome the filth of pornography and invest in meaningful and fulfilling relationships – if you are ready to quit letting these filth peddlers make a quick buck by preying on your natural God-given instincts – this is the time and the year!” iRecover provides articles, resources, tools and techniques to battle porn addiction … much like the training and planning system from FranklinCovey. And although released just two days ago, iRecover has quickly vaulted into its category’s Top 200 in France.

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irecover-1  irecover-2

February 12, 2010 | Filed Under Health, Lifestyle | 8 Comments 

Apple Continues War On Smut – Apps Rejected Due To Screenshots

smut-graffiti-FINAL About two weeks ago, we reported that Apple began a massive App Store sweep by removing once approved smut applications. Apple stated these apps were banished due to customer complaints for inappropriate content (showing too much skin). While the exact criteria for “too much skin” is unknown, pasties and hand bra apps were the biggest casualties … currently there are none left in the store. Apple’s reversal in policy came without notice, completely blindsiding developers.

And it doesn’t end there … the blindsiding smut clean up continues. Applications are now being rejected for displaying objectionable preview screenshots. Below is the email Apple is currently sending developers, informing them that … “the application screenshots must meet the requirements for a 4+ rating since these images are visible on the App Store by all users even when purchasing is restricted by the application’s rating.”

Thank you for submitting your application to the App Store. Unfortunately, xxxxx xxxxxx cannot be posted to the App Store at this time because the screenshots provided contain content that is objectionable for certain age groups. This is in violation of Section 3.3.14 from the iPhone Developer Program License Agreement that states:

 

"Applications may be rejected if they contain content or materials of any kind (text, graphics, images, photographs, sounds, etc.) that in Apple’s reasonable judgment may be found objectionable, for example, materials that may be considered obscene, pornographic, or defamatory."

 

The application screenshots must meet the requirements for a 4+ rating (no objectionable material) since these images are visible on the App Store by all users even when  purchasing is restricted by the application’s rating. The inappropriate images have been attached for your reference.

 

While your iTunes Connect Application State is displayed as Rejected, it is not necessary to upload a new binary.  Once you have made the necessary modifications, please reply to this email and we will proceed with your application review.

 

Sincerely,
iPhone App Review Team

Interesting that Ars Technica, The Big Money and Fraser Speirs all had recent articles identifying the problem of soft-core pornography being visible in the App Store. KRAPPS has also covered the matter in our “iTunes – Featuring Sexually Explicit Descriptions For All To Read” and “App Descriptions Gone Wild” articles. So perhaps Apple is listening … yet they  have a LONG way to go. Just today, a pair of Yau’s Asian Boobs applications were approved with the following screenshots …

yaus-1  yaus-2

And of course there’s plenty of non 4+ rated screenshots in the Lifestyle section of the App Store … everything from the Amateur Thongs screenshots to Caribbean Sex Fantasies (do app names also fall under the 4+ rating scrutiny? are those girls twins?).

Amateur-Thongs  Caribbean-Sex-Fantasies

Oh … since Apple now approves sex position apps, they’ll have to deal with the 69 Positions app, iKamasutra and many more.

69-Positions  iKamasutra

At the current rate, 4+ rated screenshots seems like a tall order for Apple to fulfill, especially given Apple’s history of inconsistent policy enforcement . But perhaps some day pre-schoolers will be able to peruse the App Store without being enlightened to the benefits of the Missionary position. Gee, here’s an idea … program the parental controls to disable not only the purchasing, but also viewing of restricted apps in iTunes. Come on Apple … if you can make an iPad, certainly you can handle this bit of programming … it’s all about being revolutionary, right?

February 11, 2010 | Filed Under Entertainment, Lifestyle, News | 6 Comments 

Sports Smut – The Latest App Store Sexploitation

When it comes to smut, it seems no stone has been left unturned in the App Store. Name your sleaze and chances are there’s an app for that. College Babes … Asian Boobs … MILFs … Porn Stars … Panties, Stockings, Thongs and Lingerie … Emo Chicks … Sexy Amateurs … just a few examples of the thousands of smut apps available for download.

While we try not to judge what floats your boat, these next three apps made us laugh out loud – too freaking tacky. Obviously not much is off-limits when it comes to Apple making a buck … including the sexploitation of Olympic, professional and college female athletes for your perverted pleasure. Bravo … the App Store now contains Sports Smut.

Adult Sexy Gymnast
Nice attempted save with the “Adult” descriptor. With a large percentage of girls under the age of 18 who compete in gymnastics, this app is perfect for those sick morons who give candy to little girls and watch the Summer Olympics for one reason … tight uniforms.

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Sexy-Gymnast-1  Sexy-Gymnast-2

iSpiedOnVolleyballGirls
Not only does the title alone make us feel dirty and cheap … but the tunnel vision butt shots furthers the creepiness. And you gotta love the app’s description … “17+ ONLY CONTENT” … “EXTREME CANDID SHOTS” … “FANTASTIC BOTTOMS” … “FACINATING POSES” … “NASTIEST user submitted pics” … “GET EXCITED by hot images taken on INDOOR playground”. We’re still talking about volleyball, right? Could’ve sworn we were  downloading the Girls Of Glitter Gulch application.

Volleyball-Title

volleyball-1  volleyball-2

Adult Tennis Boobs
Now we’ll be the first to admit that there are some smokin’ hot women tennis players … but dammit son, CONTROL YOURSELF! Seriously, can’t a girl just play tennis without ending up in a smut app? Hmmm … Anna Kournikova, Maria Sharapova, Maria Kirilenko, Ana Ivanovic, Victoria Azarenka and many more … ok, well maybe we’re being too harsh on Adult Tennis Boobs – we’ll let it slide <hee, hee>.

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tennis-boobs-1  tennis-boobs-2

February 10, 2010 | Filed Under Entertainment, Lifestyle | 7 Comments 

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