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Press Releases That Don’t Suck


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<confused by the title? no – you’re not in the wrong classroom. this really is KRAPPS and not Business 101. we promise.>

Being in da “biz” (LOL – whatever that means), we get a ton of press releases … and that’s nice! Everything from major app publishers, to independents, to iPhone accessory manufacturers, to those annoying SEO evangelists (LOL – whatever that means). Typical press releases are pretty straightforward:

<insert location> – <insert date> – “Company X”, a leading iPhone publisher, today announced the immediate availability of their exciting fast-paced iPhone game, “Really Cool App” in the Apple App Store. Please contact us for an exciting opportunity to review our “Really Cool App”.

Press releases … tired as shit – but we read them … and that’s nice!

Well yesterday we received a breath of fresh air from Rosebrae Technology … announcing their new iPhone game … iRateEm [iTunesYouTube]. It’s a bit of a “meanie” app, but totally an original. So check out the app’s description and its pant pissing hilarious press release filled with <hooray for> sarcasm and self-effacing humor.

irateem-title-FINAL

iRateEm 1   iRateEm 2 FINAL

—————————————————————————————————————————-

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Auckland, New Zealand – Sep 24, 2009 – Andy Griffiths, lead developer of the new iPhone application iRateEm has denied that he is the fat bloke seen in the application’s screen shots and that he rates a 4 (Munter).

Despite being short enough to be cast as an extra in Snow White and weighing over 85kg, the NZ based Brit stated "There’s no way I’m a 4, that’s so unfair. I’m at least a 6 (Not Bad) or a 7 (I would).

The new application, iRateEm, was released earlier this week and is designed to allow users to take pictures of people they see on a night out and pass them around their mates, taking turns to score their attractiveness. The loser is the player whose score is the furthest from the group average.

Although the game has received criticism from some quarters for encouraging a shallow view of people based on physical attractiveness, Griffiths is unrepentant.

"If it’s shallow to want to take a picture of a perfect stranger and immediately subject them to a judgment by my pissed up mates based on how big their booty is, then I hold my hand up and admit to being shallow. In reality iRateEm was actually conceived as a means of fostering better communications between the sexes and promoting peace and harmony for all, and there aren’t many better ways of doing that than passing around a picture of your mate Dave’s mum, who’s at least an 8 (Oh Yeah)"

Whilst the application has been praised for being well designed and written, there is strong competition from within the iTunes AppStore. Griffiths, however, is bullish.

"You’ve got to be joking, have you seen our main competitors developer? He’d be lucky to rate a 3 (Moooose) and quite frankly I have him down as a 2 (Double Bagger). Don’t tell me that a bloke with a face like a bulldog chewing a wasp is going beat us!"

<clipped to save bandwidth – we’re paying for it and it get’s expensive!>

Comments

  • ofodak

    Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    Munter

  • CyberXZT

    Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    Munter


  • Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    Munter

  • dasme

    Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    Munter 🙂

  • remy

    Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    munter


  • Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    munter


  • Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    munter

  • jimi1

    Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    Munter

  • frankstendal

    Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    Munter

  • frankstendal

    Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    Munter

  • ofodak

    Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    Moose

  • donturner

    Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    Moose


  • Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    Yeah! Moose

  • frankstendal

    Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    Moose

  • Yoshi325

    Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    Moose

  • aaronwatkins

    Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    Kudos on a great press release! Stir things up a bit!


  • Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    Agreed! A great way to bust through the clutter!

  • aaronwatkins

    Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    Kudos on a great press release! Stir things up a bit!


  • Warning: Use of undefined constant user_level - assumed 'user_level' (this will throw an Error in a future version of PHP) in /nfs/c04/h04/mnt/66964/domains/krapps.com/html/wp-content/plugins/ultimate-google-analytics/ultimate_ga.php on line 524

    Agreed! A great way to bust through the clutter!


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