Escape Reality, Become Tom Cruise – Tiki Bar For iPhone
One of our secret desires here at KRAPPS is to escape the rat race of urban living and open a bar on a warm exotic island. Our place would be called “Cocktails & Dreams” and we would engage in elaborate drink-mixing performances like Tom Cruise in Cocktail. Problem is there are no In-N-Out Burgers on exotic islands … thus shattering our dream – sucks for us.
But alas we found our savior … a new iPhone game called Tiki Bar [iTunes $1.99]. Grant it, Tiki Bar is not the perfect exotic bartending replacement … but for two bucks, it’s close enough and we can still fulfill our In-N-Out B Urge r.
Published by Caldera Studios, Tiki Bar is the first action game that has players mixing and serving drinks in a swanky Tiki Bar. After each drink is served, you collect the tip. The faster you serve drinks, the more tips you get … thus increasing your score. Just be sure to keep pace with your demanding customers or they’ll get pissed off and leave.
Mixing drinks is a blast in Tiki Bar. Caldera Studios designed a unique and very iPhone-esque user interface … shaking, cutting, juicing, pouring, stirring and blending are all there to fulfill your wildest Tom Cruise bartending dreams.
Now because gameplay takes place in a too cool Tiki Bar, the drinks served are also too cool … Bolo Cocktail, Outrigger, Apple Passion … you won’t find any Coors Light in this kick ass joint. Tiki Bar features in app purchases that extended gameplay … the matchbook ($0.99) sets up flaming drinks, while the blender ($0.99) unlocks libations that require blending … Lava Flow, Tasman Sea, Derby Daiquiri, etc.
We particularly dig using the matches which activates the Flame-O-Rama mode … not because we enjoy FIRE, FIRE, FIRE … rather for the two drinks Big Hot Wood and Flaming Nut (huh, huh).
Tiki Bar also contains some Easter eggs … rare drinks that appear roughly 1:100 drinks. Like the drink below … look at closely, it’s uncommon … Daddy’s Special Water (aka Daddy Drinks Because I Cry) – vodka poured into an iced mug, a spray of tonic and topped with Jerry Garcia gummy bears.
Not only did Caldera Studios do a phenomenal job coding the gameplay of Tiki Bar … the graphics and game music are superb. Tiki Bar includes over 450 original pieces of art by Emmy Nominated Nate Funaro of Cartoon Network and original Tiki lounge music by Marcus Baide. Obviously with this type of attention to detail, Tiki Bar is a high quality, well made application … certainly deserving of your hard earned $1.99 (which has nothing to do with Big Hot Wood).
Oh Look! The iPad Can Print!
iPad printing? Absolutely … just think outside the box!
George Michael Embraces Technology, Uses Grindr iPhone App
When we started our site in 2008, we purchased the upgraded model which includes three Perez Hilton Cards. Redeeming these cards gives us a free pass to publish trashy sleazy celebrity gossip articles … but only three of them throughout the lifetime of KRAPPS. Since we do have some integrity, our trashy sleazy celebrity gossip news will be iPhone related. Today we cash in our first Perez Hilton Card … sorry.
It appears that former Wham! frontman, George Michael, is quite the iPhone power user … especially when it comes to “social” apps. Pictured below as “Back for Wood” (dude, come on … can you pick a cheesier user name?) in the Grindr iPhone application, Mr. Michael put his iPhone to good use while on a sold-out concert tour in Australia. Using the Grindr app, Mr. Michael was setting up dates from his hotel room at the Park Hyatt Sydney hotel. Sounds like an excellent endorsement opportunity for Grindr and perhaps a step in the right direction for Mr. “I Want Your Sex” … away from his public bathroom antics.
[via Pop Crunch]
69 Cents iPad Stand Of Awesomeness – It’s Awesome!
In our quest to find the perfect yet inexpensive iPad stand, last week we presented a number of options … LEGOs, a book stand, Tinkertoys or even the family pet are decent replacements for that sack of suck Apple sells as their official iPad dock ($30 for a dock that doesn’t support landscape mode … ha! ha!). Sans family pet, the aforementioned iPad stands run in the neighborhood of $6 to $10 … not too hard on the wallet, thank you very much.
But even better news today … we one-upped the $6 to $10 price range to the cool tune of
69 cents! < SHUT UP … GET THE F OUT > Seriously … for less than a buck, you can get a lightweight, portable iPad stand that has more functionality than Apple’s krapp since this 69 cents stand supports both vertical AND horizontal orientation.
So what is this 69 cents magical device? A simple business card holder from Office Depot, discovered by New York Times’ Multimedia Editor Andrew Devigal. Nice work dude … we love it … gives us more coin for KRAPPS purchases.
Oh … and for those about to diss the 69 cents iPad stand of awesomeness for not having the ability to charge the iPad while docked … deal with it – it’s SIXTY NINE FREAKING CENTS!
[Andrew Devigal via Technabob]
App Store First – Videos Of Hot Chicks Farting
Like it or not, fart apps are here to stay … and for better or for worse, they continue to evolve. Debuting in December 2008, fart apps were simply one-dimensional soundboards … touch your iPhone’s screen – hear a fart … whoop-dee-doo. Over time, fart soundboards became archaic. These days there are Fart Dialers (dial a phone number and each digit is a different fart) … Farts With Push Notifications (alert friends and family that you just farted) … Farting Boobs (don’t ask) … and many more creative uses of anal acoustics on the iPhone.
With hundreds and hundreds of fart apps available for download, you would think no fart stone has been left unturned … not true! When it comes to toilet humor, the human mind is a powerful thing! As such, we present another crowning achievement (pun?) for insane iPhone methane … iFart Video … proudly developed by SellYourMac.com.
iFart Video is the first fart application that offers video … capturing people’s gassy moments on film … which can then be shared with other users worldwide via Facebook, Twitter or email from within the app. Yeah, there’s nothing more idiotic satisfying than watching someone fart … yeah.
Although iFart Video comes loaded with existing videos of hot women making rude noises (there words, not ours … we actually prefer our hot women to have their heads attached … then again, some may prefer a hot quiet woman … whatever), SellYourMac.com developers are asking users to submit their best fart flicks to be considered for inclusion in future app updates. That would be quite an honor … video of your ass passing gas in iFart Video!
iFart Video contains a total 15 videos of the aforementioned hot chicks farting … at 99 cents for the app, that’s less that 7 cents per fart video … which is either a great or crappy deal, depending on your point of view. Choose from such classic videos like “Assplosion”, “Redneck” or “Monkey Business”. And SellYouMac.com assures us that all farts featured in iFart Video are authentic and real.
Like we said … for better or for worse, fart apps continue to “evolve” … and now we have videos. Even if you don’t plan to partake in iFart Video, you at least owe it to yourself to watch SellYourMac.com’s promo video below. Witnessing firsthand this guy’s passion and commitment to farts is priceless … not to mention you’ll learn a valuable lesson about the adverse effects of consuming too much Red Bull and Cotton Candy in one sitting … YOWZA this guy is F’ING CRAZY!
Technology Gone Bad – Allow Sex Offenders To Determine Your Location
One of the iPhone’s many cool features is Location Services … using a combination of cell towers, Wi-Fi and GPS to determine your location. This functionality comes is handy for navigation on the iPhone’s map – using a weather app to determine your local weather – locating the nearest Starbucks … or a host of other geolocation functions.
But sometimes Location Services isn’t all that … like when it allows Sex Offenders to determine your location … HUH? – OUCH!
Recap: Week Of April 5 – plus Ever Look At 3.14 In A Mirror? WOW!
In case you missed any of our perfect iPhone chaos, quick links to this week’s articles.
April 5 – Apple Bans Blatant Doodle Jump Ripoff, But Approves Another, Doodle Drop
April 6 – Dog Translator App Does Not Translate Dog To English – No Shit Sherlock
April 7 – We Are Growing Increasingly Uncomfortable With The iPad – Here’s Why …
April 8 – From LEGOs To Live Animals – An Early Look At DIY iPad Stands
April 9 – App For The Seriously Demented – Swami Paws The LOLcat Fortune Teller
April 10 – Get Hooked On HELLKID – One Hell Of An Addicting iPhone Game
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3.14 In A Mirror … WOW!
Sometimes it’s the little things in life that make us go “WOW”. Like this tidbit from The Puzzler column at Chicago Now. Ever look at 3.14 in a mirror? Pretty freaky, eh?