Corner Office – Payin’ the Cost To Be the Boss

(written by guest author Tim Giron. follow Tim on Twitter @timgiron)

Ah, yes, the corner office. The lair of the Big Cheese, the Prime Kahuna, the HMFIC; you get the picture. But, you might be asking yourself, how can I achieve this lofty goal? How can I secure that corner office, with all of the trappings of success that accompany it? I’m pretty sure that just by asking the question, you are out of the running! You’re better off with more realistic goals, like figuring out who keeps stealing your lunch from the breakroom refrigerator. When you get the urge to set your sights higher, you could just pull out your iPhone and load up Corner Office [iTunes] by Low Brow Software instead.


Your first mission is to capture a photo of your boss with the iPhone camera. How you do this without having to explain that you will ultimately be defacing their likeness is left up to you and your ninja skillz. Me, I opted for taking a photo of a posted photo of my boss. Way less damaging for the career!

Corner Office 2

Your next mission is to throw things at your faux boss while they berate you with over 100 one liners. There are different phrases depending on whether you have a male or female boss. You start out throwing pies, but if you work really hard, you get to throw other things like bananas or mice (the computer peripheral, not the rodent). It was at this stage that I realized the developers had perfectly captured one element of corporate life: work hard and you might just receive a pointless reward!


Corner Office 3

When you’re ready for a mission with some action (but only a little more), there are two game modes to play. In the game Face Time, the boss figure moves around the screen while you try to hit him or her with more pies, earning cash and promotions along the way. In the game You’re Fired, you need to keep a steady flame going by tilting the device while not running out of fuel.


By now, you’ve probably accumulated some pictures as mementos of playing the games. Your final mission is to clog up the company’s email system by sharing these with your co-workers. Add a quote bubble with a witty management saying like "Johnson, where’s that monthly TPS report!" and it’s sure to get forwarded around the company, cementing your legendary status as "that guy that got fired for putting the CEOs face on a gorilla and throwing pies at it".


At the time of this writeup, this compendium of office themed activities was priced at $2.99 (originally released at $4.99). A little steep for your average cubicle drone, if you ask me.