Ok – we admit it … we’re not huge fans of the App Store’s “Books” category. Nothing against books or reading of course … it’s just that we rarely discover anything KRAPPS-worthy in “Books”. But you know … that’s probably a good thing. So we’ll just keep chillin’ in the krappiest of categories – “Entertainment”.
But getting back to “Books” … strange thing happened to us the other day. While conducting our usual research process in “Entertainment” … something kept drawing us to “Books”. It was the strangest thing … like some supernatural power came over us. Frankly, we were scared shitless and didn’t want to visit “Books” … but aura was strong, like the Force of a Jedi Knight – freaking Yoda-like. Something just kept pushing and pushing us towards “Books”. So we finally let go. We succumbed to this higher power … jotted over to “Books” … and the calling became clear. We realized why we didn’t stand a chance against this higher power … this Force. We were helpless against Penis Power.
But of course … the Phallic Worship app. Screw those other magic apps. Phallic Worship is the real deal … we’re talking “male generative powers” … aka Penis Power! All hail the mighty phallic.
Hmmm … books. You know what sucks – trying to read a nasty book in public. More often than not, we find ourselves on a crowded subway, or at a sold-out baseball game with 45,000 other folks, or stuck in that “comfy” middle seat on a 6-hour non-stop flight from New York to Los Angeles. And in these situations … we just want to enjoy a titillating read. But it’s tough. Sitting in these cramped quarters, trying to be discreet … it just doesn’t work. Too many wandering eyes checking out our hardback (no pun intended) – very frustrating indeed (again … no pun intended).
But thanks to Penis Power, we discovered an awesome new book app which allows us to enjoy nasty literary pleasures – wherever, whenever – all on the privacy of our own iPhone.
YES! thank you – thank you …. Naughty Spanking 3, erotic reading on your iPhone. Now just mix in one of those PhoneDevil privacy screen protectors and perv away in public to your heart’s content.
But alas, the “Entertainment” category completes us. So for those of you who rather write than read … it’s cool, we feel you. We found the perfect app for all you budding erotic writers, hoping one day to become a staff writer for Penthouse Letters (wait … you mean those are really written by Penthouse readers? … no way) or just your ordinary everyday crossdresser – 1001 Sex Life Stories.