We know what you’re thinking … “what kind of whack job title is that? –
my the revolutionary iPhone makes me “smaller” members (no pun intended) of the population feel good about my their penis? WTF!” Ok look, we don’t make this shit up (we couldn’t – even if we tried) … all our content is Apple-approved material. Apple said the iPhone changes everything and now that includes the way you fancy your penis … Male Size.
According to Male Size developer Seligman Ventures Ltd, studies have shown that males underestimate the size of their penis … meaning that relaxed dick of yours is really larger than 555 million penises worldwide. And that’s the whole key to Male Size … 555 MILLION cocks. Seems like a really big number – seems like your 2½ inch flaccid penis is larger than HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS of dicks … and that’s nice – makes you feel good! Or that 5 inch erection … that’s an impressive boner too. Bigger than ONE HUNDRED MILLION hard-on’s … yipeee!
But alas Male Size is not a complete miracle worker. There comes a point where teeny tiny meets itsy bitsy … no app can make you feel better about a pencil dick. If your limp biscuit is under 2 inches or you sport wood below 4½ inches … sucks to be you.
We spoke Seligman Ventures about their one-of-a-kind application, specifically if they plan to support Male Size going forward. And great news … the developers are totally committed to small dicks and Male Size version 2.0 will include a handy in-app ruler. You just need to launch Male Size – touch the ruler button – whip out your …
STOP! Too Much Information! Disturbing Mental Images!
We keep picturing those poor bastards in Apple’s app approval department … testing the functionality of each app. Don’t even want to envision how they’ll go about reviewing Male Size’s penis ruler … ewww!
So moral of the story – big or small (well, especially small), lighten up on your dick and feel good about it! After all, it’s not easy being a penis … it hangs around with two nuts all the time – its next door neighbor is a real asshole – and even worse, his owner beats him!