anti-KRAPPS – TextLater

>>> and now for a break from our regularly scheduled programming <<<
anti-KRAPPS is a periodic update highlighting lesser known apps (no one needs another “Google Earth Rocks!” review) which provide high value and excellent functionality. ==================================================================

Title: TextLater
Category: Productivity

update 1/8/09: all TextLater download codes have been claimed – thank you

Oh krapps, I forgot to pick up my kid from school!
Oh krapps, I forgot to send that package to the winner of my eBay auction!
Oh krapps, I forgot to sign up for health insurance!
Oh krapps, I forgot to buy fish food!

textlatericon I am busy. There never seems to be enough hours in the day to complete my never-ending task/project list. Although I’m not a hip Google or Outlook Calendar geek (or a Day-Timer dork), I do manage to keep myself fairly well organized. However, similar to most people, I experience my share of “oh krapps” moments.

Well I’m happy to report that my share of “oh krapps” moments have drastically reduced thanks to the TextLater iPhone app. I use this app on a daily basis. In a nutshell, with TextLater, you can schedule text messages to be delivered on a specific date and time. Pretty simple concept, but for my purposes as a self-reminder, its pure genius. TextLater’s possibilities are endless:

textlaterscreen2 > Travel a lot on business? Send daily “Good Morning” texts to your loved one.
> Someone’s birthday? Schedule a “Happy Birthday” text to arrive on that special day.
> Do you suck at romance? Send periodic “I Love You” texts to your wife.
> Promised to deliver McDonald’s lunch to your child at school at noon? Send yourself a reminder at 11:00am.

Sure you can set self-reminders with the horrid native iPhone Calendar app and its lame chime alert … but why? For a mere 99 cents, TextLater is so much better, more convenient and provides greater functionality (not to mention the developer – Skidmore Apps –  just released a fantastic update which shows they are committed to continually improving the app). Heck, with daily “I Love You” text messages, it might be more effective and cheaper than marriage counseling.

FREE TextLater app to KRAPPS Viewers!

Skidmore Apps was kind enough to provide KRAPPS five promo codes which will allow our viewers to download TextLater for FREE. Be one of the first 5 readers to tweet on Twitter:

“got iPhone? visit KRAPPS! outing whacky, weird, stupid & strange apps for your entertainment. http://KRAPPS.com”

We will then direct message you the download code while supplies last. Make sure you follow us on Twitter – @KRAPPS – so we can direct message the code.

January 8, 2009 | Filed Under anti-KRAPPS | 8 Comments 

The Toothless One Speaks

w1.2 Per Wikipedia, flatulence humor has long been considered funny in cultures that believe the public passing of gas is impolite. The earliest recorded fart jokes appeared in the 5th century play “The Knights” by Aristophanes. Both Benjamin Franklin and Mark Twain dropped fart funnies in their written work. Even the Whoopee Cushion, which was invented in 1930, has historic significance as it evolved from a simple rubber noisemaker to a self-inflating and remote-controlled device in the 1990s … which bring us to now, 2009 … The Year Of The iPhone Fart.

stinkyiPhone iPhone fart apps have been the hot topic lately. Blogs, discussion forums, Twitter, newspapers and even television … everyone is buzzing about iPhone farts. It all started December 12, 2008, when the first 4 fart apps were released: iFart Mobile, iPooted, Fart Machine and Pull My Finger. Since then, fart apps have been hitting the App Store at a furious pace – approximately 3 new fart apps appear each day. To date, there are approximately 48 iPhone farting applications. When will fart apps finally run out of gas (no pun intended)? – who knows – but one thing is certain … love ‘em or hate ‘em … iPhone farts are here to stay.

Random Observations …

> iFart Mobile is the overall #1 paid app
> Similar iFart Mobile copy-apps: iFart, my iFart and uFart
> WhoopieCushion is the top free fart app and is ranked #15 amongst all free apps
> Too many WhoopieCushion copy-apps: iWhoopee, iWhoopi, iWhoopie, iWoopi Cushion, iWhoopieCushion, Whoopie Cushion, Whoopee Cushion and Whoopee!!
> Creative titles: Mr. Poot!, Cheese Cutter, Gas Master and Excuse Me
> Expanded functionality: record your fart and email farts 
> Fart games are now starting to appear: Fart Bubbles and Name That Fart
> What’s Next predictions: Rock Paper Fart, Tic-Tac-Fart, Fart Lighter, GPS Fart Locator

And finally … a visual tribute to the first 48 fart apps …

farts_JPG010509x600

January 7, 2009 | Filed Under Entertainment | 32 Comments 

Fun With Dick And Jane

Title: Ball
Category: Entertainment

BallScreen Look Jane.
Look, look.
See Dick.

See Dick, iPhone.
See Dick iPhone app Ball.
Ball, Ball, Ball.

BallDickandJaneCover Come, Jane. 
Come and play.
Come and play iPhone Ball.

Bounce, Ball.
Bounce, bounce, bounce.
Oh Ball.

Come and see.
Come and see iPhone Ball.
Come and see Ball bounce, bounce, bounce.

Oh Ball.
Oh Ball why?
Why iPhone Ball just bounce, bounce and that is all?

See Jane frown.
See Dick sad.
Bad iPhone app, bad.

January 6, 2009 | Filed Under Entertainment | Leave a Comment 

Chicks Dig Me

Title: Finger Sprint
Category: Games

Finger Sprint Icon WARNING – We are about to spotlight an app that is so freaking unbelievable and exciting that we must request (require) our viewers to sit down before reading this entry. We do not want you to collapse from becoming overjoyed.

In a world of boring and dull iPhone games, the Finger Sprint app is pure genius and a breath of fresh air. As the developer describes:

Finger Sprint is the game you’ve been waiting for! Run your fingers as fast as you can to try and get the number 1 space on the leader board.

True, I’ve been waiting for an iPhone game where I can finally display my God given talent of finger running.

This game gets even better with friends. Once people see you playing, they will want to have a go and try to beat your fastest time.

Too cool. Finger Sprint will completely change my life. I’ll make tons of friends and if I’m dedicated, chicks will dig me because I’m the bad ass Finger Sprint champion of the World!

Finger-Sprint-Shirt

Tip: Take long strides on the screen with your fingers to get maximum distance per step.

Thank you developers for this insight. I hope in the future a complete “Finger Sprint Training Guide” is published so I can become the champion of the world and have chicks dig me.

Like we said and we think you’ll agree … Finger Sprint is just plain wicked awesome … which is why we are totally put off by the user reviews in the App Store … why the haters?

Finger-Sprint-Reviews

Finally, as a special treat to our viewers, we leave you with video footage of Finger Sprint in action. This clip is amazing – jam packed with Finger Sprint action – you will love it!

January 5, 2009 | Filed Under Games | 11 Comments 

Twisted John

Title: Ringr Roulette
Category: Lifestyle

welcome KROQ listeners! you know the magic word … jump on your FREE app now!

hung John Ellis has a twisted sense of humor. He’s the guy who sets you up on a fugly blind date … buys your baby boy a “Hung Like A Five Year Old” onesie … thinks rock is dead because paper killed it … burns ants with a magnifying glass … wore a tuxedo t-shirt to his high school prom … is obsessed with Punk’d, Jackass and Viva La Bam.

Although twisted, John is a talented iPhone app developer and founder of Dove Valley Apps. Dove Valley released a very solid My Tag Show app … but their other offering – Ringr Roulette… well, it’s not exactly Google Earth material. John’s twisted humor was at it again – more on that later.

couture It’s a well known fact that most people suffer from Liquid Courage. You know … drink too much beer, wine, margaritas, etc … and suddenly you are attempting to score with hotties way out of your league, getting tattoos or thinking you’re a bad ass UFC fighter like Randy Couture. Another side effect of Liquid Courage is Drunk Dialing … making phone calls while intoxicated to ex-boyfriends/girlfriends or guys/girls you want to hook up with … bad idea! To help curb your drunk dialing urge – iPhone to the rescue – there are apps that will prevent you from dialing unless you can pass the programs built in sobriety test.

Now remember our friend “Twisted John”? He’s here to actually help you drunk dial … help you make an ass out of yourself … help you wake up the next morning and think “oh KRAPPS, what the hell did I do last night”. John’s brilliance gives every shit faced dumbass the ability to dial drunk dial … simply launch his Ringr Roulette app, shake your phone and boom … you are off to drunk dialing heaven. But John has some heart – he’s included a convenient “Chicken Out” button in case you’re really not that drunk … and the ability to program an “Exclude” list while you are sober, thus avoiding the drunk dial to your grandmother, priest, boss or parole officer at 3:00am. So no worries … have another beer … John’s got your back.

 Ringr Roulette Screen 1             Ringr Roulette Screen 2


FREE Ringr Roulette to KRAPPS Viewers!
Twisted John was kind enough to provide KRAPPS ten promo codes which will allow our viewers to download Ringr Roulette for FREE. Be one of the first 10 readers to either leave a comment on this post or direct message KRAPPS via Twitter and we’ll email you the download code while supplies last.

December 31, 2008 | Filed Under Lifestyle | 29 Comments 

Chill Potato

Title: Funky-O-Meter
Category: Lifestyle

FunkyOMeterIcon The Funky-O-Meter app leverages the iPhone’s GPS functionality to retrieve funky places, thus allowing the user to visit these funky establishments and get their groove on. Users also have the ability to build and share their funky network by rating establishments based on a numerical Funkyness Factor.

I’m still not exactly sure what’s the app’s purpose (it kept crashing my iPhone), however one thing is certain – OLD people should not be developing or writing descriptions for apps. Terms like: Funky, Funkyness Value, Funky Meter, Un-Funky, Chill Potato, Get Funky … sorry, not clever and not the way to market your app. Come on guys … put down the bong, hit stop on the 8-track tape player spinning The Grateful Dead and step out of your El Camino… welcome to the year 2008. News Flash: funky is old – it farts dust – and it’s not cool (not to be mistaken with Funk music which is indeed cool – James Brown, George Clinton, War, etc.).

funkyometer1             funkyometer2

And for you continued pleasure, I’ll let the app’s description do the rest of the “talking”:

– How funky is it here?
– Wheres the nearest funky place?
– How do you keep funky dudes like me away from un-funky places?

 

We all wanna be hanging out where its most funky. So the funky-o-meter keeps you in-the-know with all thats funky and away from the just plain chilly and dull aka non-funky.

 

The funkyometer is a geo-tagging application, which allows users to tag locations and set funkyness values on a scale from 0 not Funky to 100 very Funky. Funky guys and gals like you and your friends determine whats hot and funky and whats not. The application will then calculate an areas total funky-ness rating – and point out the super funky or very un-funky places near you.

 

Its easy and fun to use!

 

So dont be a chill potato, man…. Go out there and Get Funky!

Technorati Tags: ,,,,,

December 30, 2008 | Filed Under Lifestyle | 1 Comment 

Shinning Fiends

Title: Shake.Rock (for your great party)
Category: Music

Ok, this one is such KRAPPS we don’t even know where to begin. Let’s start by reading the Shake Rock app’s description …

Shake-Rock-Desc
First of all, if you decide to sell an app in the American iTunes Store, make sure your description makes some effing sense.
“You will be shinning in your fiends” –  shinning = climb & fiend = devil … so you will be climbing in your devil
“Choosing it quickly!” ??? “This program makes you” ??? … Shinning fiends quickly makes you ???… wtf … HELLO … American iTunes Store – hint, hint – speak ENGLISH … or spend some money and have someone translate this KRAPPS for you.

Second, maybe we are not cool or hip enough, but WTF is a Party Logo and why do we need one? We’ve been to our fair share of parties and clubs throughout the years – never once saw someone displaying a Party Logo. Do chicks dig Party Logos? Will a Party Logo get you free drinks? VIP lounge access? English As A Second Language classes?

Shake-Rock-Logo4               Shake-Rock-Logo3               Shake-Rock-Logo2               Shake-Rock-Logo1

Third, we’re not sure, but we think we figured out how to make this app work … so you select the Party Logo category and then shake your iPhone … a Party Logo sort of appears, then disappears, then it seems to freeze your iPhone, then it flickers, then the screen goes blank … huh??? … hell, try it for yourself – if you are 100% sure you figured it out, let us know – we are dying to flash our bitching Party Logo next time we go out clubbing.

original photo by Michael Hart (aka Mekka) on Flickr 
And finally, this app was released on Oct 25 for $3.99 … $3.99!!! … who in their right effing mind would buy this app for 4 bones and why the eff would 6tags.com (the developer) think people would buy it??? Shake.Rock (for your great party) is a KRAPPS name, it doesn’t work, no one needs a Party Logo and the app’s description sounds like it was written by someone totally hammered … yeah, 4 bones makes a lot of sense. No wonder the app has ZERO customer reviews as it probably has ZERO sales. But 6tags.com is genius, on Nov 11 they lowered the price to 99 cents … brilliant .. NOT … still ZERO customer reviews. So then the price was lowered yet again on Dec 5 to FREE. Attention Apple and 6tags.com … stop the KRAPPS … make the App Store a safer place … shinning fiends (aka “climbing devils”) are evil … exorcise Shake.Rock (for your great party) app quickly … BEGONE!

December 29, 2008 | Filed Under Music | 4 Comments 

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