The Impossible Dream
Back in February, we ran an article titled History Was Made, Sort Of. We opened the article by commenting on the massive number of fart, burp and vomit KRAPPS that were beginning to appear in the App Store. The story continued stating that even with all these KRAPPS launching, there were still no urine apps … and while we could foresee a day when a urine app could get approved from Apple, we concluded that a urine sound effect app was just too crude and vulgar – even for Apple’s relaxed standards. So we settled for the next best thing, urine assistant apps, apps that help you pee in public when you get stage fright … the iPee and Shy Bladder apps.
(by the way, after our article hit Twitter … @Shy_Bladder began following us … go figure)
Boy have times have changed … flash forward two months and what we thought would be impossible for Apple to approve … we are shocked once again.
So you get where this is going … The Pee Factory app by Talus Media. A proud and historic Apple moment … the first iPhone app which simulates the sound of taking a leak .. and the newest member of the Appa iFonna Chi fraternity. With a simple touch of a button, you can make your friends think you’re peeing on their couch, in their car, in a water bottle or wherever. Pissing intensities vary from “Tinkle” …. to “Like A Race Horse”.
But hold on, it gets better. The Pee Factory is no rudimentary pee pee app … oh no … this is advanced pissing technology at its finest! It’s like virtual reality pissing – you can control the intensity of urine flow by holding your iPhone up or down … you can sprinkle your pee by rapidly tilting/shaking your iPhone (gee, wonder what that’s supposed to simulate). And since this is such a complex app, thank God Talus Media included detailed instructions on how to properly use The Pee Factory …
So everyone – please take a moment to reflect. Reflect on this new achievement of krap from Apple. Reflect on your dreams and no matter what, never give up … rather follow those dreams to their fullest … because if Apple can approve a pissing app, then any dream is possible. And thank you Apple! … Thank you for this daily inspiration and of course, just what we need … a PISSING iPhone.
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