Wax A Hairy Groin With This iPhone App (FREAK)

Can we ask you a couple of personal questions? We promise not to judge and will keep your responses confidential … seriously, cross our hearts and pinky swear.

> Do you secretly desire applying wax on a
man’s hairy groin area using only your
fingers?

> Does it turn you on to rip off the applied wax
   and witness your victim scream in pain
   while his hairless groin pulsates and turns
   pink?

If you answered “Yes” to one or more of the above … FREAK! But hey, it’s all good … like we said, we won’t judge (FREAK). Rather, we’re here to help you (SICKO) by announcing the new ManWax app from RustyCroc … guaranteed to satisfy your ultimate (FREAK) male pubic hair waxing fetish.

Hmmm … now that we think about it, these rusty crocodiles might be onto something. Just think about the possibilities … BikiniWax, LandingStripWax, BrazilianWax, AppleWax (for the ultimate fan-boy/girl), etc. Hey, don’t laugh … if Apple approved the Asian Boobs app, surely they would accept a whole plethora of pubic hair removal apps. And with Apple’s ridonkulous approval process, we wouldn’t be surprised if RustyCroc’s secret “project seagull” is really the Brightsmiles For Bungholes app (ewww … come on – let’s go … it’s a fashion trend!).