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Recap: Week Of May 3 – plus Linkin Park 8-Bit T-Shirt Giveaway
In case you missed any of our perfect iPhone chaos, quick links to this week’s articles.
May 3: Sex Tip Found Hidden In Stickbound iPhone Game [Wording Fail]
May 4: It’s A Bird, It’s A Plane … It’s Sperman iPhone Game!
May 5: iPhone Can Now Determine Ripeness Of Watermelons
May 6: Amazing Human Calculator Determines How Much Snot You’ve Swallowed And More
May 7: Ever Wish You Could Fart On Command? Now There’s An App For That!
May 8: Linkin Park Wants YOU to Join the 8-Bit Rebellion!
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Giveaway Time – Linkin Park 8-Bit T-Shirt!
Yesterday we reviewed the very cool Linkin Park 8-Bit Rebellion! iPhone, iPod Touch and iPad games. Created by Linkin Park and Artificial Life, Inc. … the band was involved in every aspect of the game (total geeks): storylines, character design and best of all, music. Talk about commitment … Linkin Park vocalist Mike Shinoda designed the band members’ avatars and edited every line of dialogue.
Anywho, be sure to check out our Linkin Park 8-Bit Rebellion! review -> http://bit.ly/9CHenw
Continuing Linkin Park weekend here at KRAPPS, we are giving away an awesome Linkin Park 8-Bit T-Shirt. One lucky winner will receive this killer shirt and be the envy of his/her peeps. To enter the contest, send us a video of yourself setting fire to a Justin Bieber CD … JUST KIDDING … to enter, tweet the following by 11:59PM Tuesday, May 11:
GIVEAWAY -> enter to win a @LinkinPark #8BitRebellion T-SHIRT! Visit @KRAPPS for details http://bit.ly/aLuCWp
Winner will be chosen randomly from entries and announced via Twitter on Wednesday, May 12. Make sure you follow us on Twitter … @KRAPPS … so that we can notify you via direct message if you win. Good luck!
Linkin Park Wants YOU to Join the 8-Bit Rebellion!
(written by guest author Tim Giron. follow Tim on Twitter @timgiron)
Somewhere in India, a phone rings …
Apple Dude: iPhone/iPad service hotline, how may I help you?
Fanboy: Yeah, um, both my iPhone and my iPad have a problem with the built-in speakers
Apple Dude: Can you describe the issue?
Fanboy: Yeah, so these advanced devices currently sound suspiciously like my old Nintendo
Apple Dude: Both of them, eh? So, tell me, have you purchased any new games lately?Fanboy: Yeah, I was just playing "Linkin Park 8-Bit Rebellion!"… that’s when I noticed the sound thing. See, I know every Linkin Park song by heart and…
Apple Dude: Every one?
Fanboy: That’s right, every one, and these just sound a little, like, different.
Apple Dude: Sir, what you are hearing is the carefully crafted sound of "retro" beautifully rendered through your wisely chosen next generation devices. But, I have to question whether or not you truly know every Linkin Park song by heart.
Fanboy: Huh?
Apple Dude: See, once you complete the game, you’ll unlock a brand new, exclusive track. So, until you’ve mastered the game, there will be one song that you won’t yet know.
Fanboy: Well, then I guess I better get back to it, thanks!
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Linkin Park 8-Bit Rebellion! for iPhone [iTunes $4.99] and Linkin Park 8-Bit Rebellion! iPad Edition [iTunes $4.99] were developed by Artificial Life, Inc. in collaboration with the band. Featuring 8-bit versions of eight songs, including One Step Closer and my personal favorite: New Divide. The 8-bit songs are fantastically re-imagined (there is a media player so you can listen to them at your leisure as well).
It took me a little bit to figure out the game side of things. One key observation: it’s important to pay attention to the current mission objective since character interactions will be different depending on whether or not you’ve completed the current goal.
I found the iPad edition to be easier to play overall, but that’s likely to be attributed to the fact 
that my iPhone is a 3G so it’s a little sluggish with the bigger apps.
If you’re interested in the background of how the app came together, I encourage you to check out the blog of Linkin Park’s Mike Shinoda –> http://MikeShinoda.com … and if you want to sport one of these cool 8-bit avatars (mine’s got a lot of orange on it since I am a Phoenix Suns fan), head on over to http://www.8bityourself.com.
[heads-up … tomorrow we’ll be announcing a Linkin Park 8-Bit T-Shirt giveaway. It’s a very cool shirt and you will not want to miss it … stay tuned]
Ever Wish You Could Fart On Command? Now There’s An App For That!
From the moment we read the opening line of this app’s description, we knew it belonged on KRAPPS. Or to quote the awesome movie Jerry Maguire … you had me at “hello”. Pocket Fart, you complete us!
Have you ever wished you could fart on command just by lifting your leg?
You know, come to think of it … it would be kind of cool to fart on command. We already have the extraordinary ability to burp on command, so being able to fart on command would give us two superpowers and make us totally irresistible with chicks.
Pocket Fart is no ordinary fart app. Developers Riccardo Roveri and Matteo Cortonesi decided to leverage the iPhone’s accelerometer in an unprecedented way … motion controlled flatulence. Simply stick your iPhone preferably in your pocket and Pocket Fart will then play the butt trumpet based on different types of movements.
We’ve heard of bluetooth and push notification-based fart apps, but using the iPhone’s accelerometer to transform its user into a fart on command superhero is an App Store first. Bravo Riccardo and Matteo … you two kooks are brilliant and we now have our Halloween costume picked out five months in advance … FARTMAN!
Amazing Human Calculator Determines How Much Snot You’ve Swallowed And More
Have you ever wondered how old you are down to the second? Or the number of times you’ve blinked? How long your hair would be if you never cut it? How much toothpaste have you used?
Yeah … neither have we. Pretty bizarre thoughts for us normal peeps … but let’s try some others …
How much snot you’ve swallowed? Or the lifetime weight of your poop? How about the amount of liquid you’ve peed? Number of times your farted?
We hear you … still a resounding “NO”. Well since we brought it up and through the power of suggestion … you probably are now wondering the exact amount of snot you’ve swallowed over the course of your lifetime. And since we’re not a bunch of stuck-up teases, we have the answers! But first you must download the Amazing Human Calculator app.
Amazing Human Calculator [iTunes] is a new FREE app from LOLer Apps which attempts to satisfy your bizarre and random curiosities. Being the eccentric folks they are, LOLer Apps spent many months researching the strangest human facts and gifting their findings in the form of the Amazing Human Calculator app.
Simply enter the date and time of your birth and the Human Calculator will spit out 22 freaky facts, custom calculated for the individual user … how much blood has been recycled through your body, how many hours you’ve spent yawning or how long would your nails be if you never clipped them.
Fascinating and frightening material considering an average 35 year old has eaten over 60,000 pounds of food and swallowed nearly 13,000 quarts of snot. BLEH … too much information!
iPhone Can Now Determine Ripeness Of Watermelons
Developers never cease to amaze us. With nearly 200,000 applications available for download … and just when you think there really is an app for everything … some ingenious developer comes along and publishes an original app that makes you go, “damn, why didn’t I think of that?”
Last weekend we had yet another one of those “Ok This Time There Really Is An App For Everything” moments … as iWatermelon Deluxe was launched on Saturday.
The premise of iWatermelon Deluxe is simple … use your iPhone to determine the ripeness of a watermelon (yeah, why didn’t we think of that?). In three easy steps, you’ll be like Superman using his X-ray vision … peering deep in the bowels of the underhalls watermelon. Just place your iPhone on top of the desired watermelon … step 1 – select the melon’s size … step 2 – select its color …
step 3 – tap the melon three times. iWatermelon Deluxe will then analyze the resulting sound using a unique custom made formula for determining whether the watermelon is unripe, fair or nectar of the gods.
At 99 cents, iWatermelon Deluxe [iTunes] provides solid value, a lifetime of sweetness and perhaps even romance. Since they say the grocery store is a great place to hook up with other singles … using your iPhone in the fruit aisle just might be the ultimate turn on for geek-like minds.
[hooray for us! not a single sexual innuendo in the entire melons article … HA]
It’s A Bird, It’s A Plane … It’s Sperman iPhone Game!
Bet we know what you’re thinking … “how come Apple hasn’t approved a REAL superhero application for the iPhone?” Sure there’s the new Iron Man 2 game … Superman, Batman and Spiderman all have apps. When it comes to the category of superheroes, the App Store is severely lacking.
But wait … look, up in the sky! … it’s a bird … it’s plane … it’s Sperman!
Yes, it’s Sperman! Strange visitor from another planet who came to earth with powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal men. Strong as a freight train … faster than a speeding bullet … Sperman fights the never-ending battle for truth, justice and the Apple way.
HA … wish it was that cool. Unfortunately the Sperman iPhone game is simply a bizarre tale of some sizzling hot party coupled with cool girls winking, flirting and getting some tonight. Not even a mention of half Spanish, half German chicks … argh! Now go on … read the drug-induced Sperman description …
“Dance with me if you want to get some tonight” – LMAO, Sperman the manwhore, our hero!
To play Sperman, shake your iPhone to avoid sperm kissing your ovum. Failure to shake off the sperm will result in mad sperms digging in the ovum (seriously, who writes this shit?).
Sperman can be had for only $2.99 … which is a pure bargain considering this app really does represent the Apple way here at KRAPPS.
Sex Tip Found Hidden In Stickbound iPhone Game [Wording Fail]
Stickbound is an original gaming experience … the only stick jumping game available on the iPhone. Touch Arcade calls Stickbound “a fun and compelling experience.” AppSpy is equally enthusiastic, “it’s amazingly addictive.” At 99 cents, Stickbound [iTunes] seems like a solid deal.
A solid deal … or is it even better?
Actually for some confused souls, Stickbound provides priceless information that will help turn their bedroom activities into a state of eternal bliss. Properly placed in the “Instructions” section of the game … sometimes the obvious must be stated, even if it’s a wording fail.
(we extend a long hat tip to @Spudski for making us aware of this awkward situation)
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