2,000 Apps Later, BrightHouse Labs Still Sucks

<roll theme song from COPS>
“Bad boys, bad boys, watcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do when they come for you”

Apple-Tackle-Streaker-FINAL Did you hear about the App Store’s episode of COPS? In an undercover operation, Apple raided and revoked the developer’s license of Khalid Shaikh, founder of Perfect Acumen. Khalid was pretty much running a sweat shop for app development … requiring his 26 employees (primarily based in Pakistan) to work 12 hours a day, 6 days a week. A 72 hour work week? – you MOFO Khalid! Perfect Acumen’s results were impressive – they published 943 apps in about 8 months. Obviously when you churn and burn at this rate, the net output is complete garbage …
943 KRAPPS most priced at a bargain rate of $4.99. Anyways, Apple basically got sick of Khalid’s bullshit and yanked him from their program. For more details about this episode of COPS … check out MobileCrunch’s solid article.

Inspired by the “Khalid Take Down” story, we decided to check up on our “favorite” developer BrightHouse Labs (aka Arctic Gerbil). In our last article on May 7, BrightHouse Labs published approximately 689 apps (we use the term “apps” loosely) … 195 SupaFan apps, 148 Quote apps, 82 SlidePuzzle apps, etc … indeed great work by BrightHouse, bravo!

Well about 3 months later, it’s obvious, BrightHouse Labs is still hard at work spamming the App Store … errr … publishing apps. There are now 169 pages of BrightHouse Lab produced apps … at 12 apps per page, this equates to well over 2,000 apps. If Khalid demands a 72 hour work week, we can’t even imagine the hours these poor Arctic Gerbils must succumb too. Let’s see … about 13 weeks later … net increase of 1,339 apps … that’s 103 apps per week … or about 15 apps per day from May 7 to August 19. Huh?!?

BrightHouse-Labs-169-pages-FINAL 

Now props to Apple for busting on Khalid! But uh, come on … maybe you got the wrong guy? Or maybe Apple needs to add BrightHouse Labs to their “Most Wanted” list. Not really sure what’s going on at One Infinite Loop since just a couple of weeks ago the 514th SupaFan app (Demi Moore Fans) was approved. Come on … TWO FREAKING THOUSAND apps … you suck!

arctic_gerbil_logo_NO Best part of this whole BrightHouse Labs thing is that not only are they a joke here at KRAPPS, but also among their peers. Chris Noel of BrightHouse Labs contacted Satosoft’s CEO, Graham French, inquiring if Satosoft was interested in either selling them the iAboutClock application or some of its source code for BrightHouse’s own development use. BrightHouse must have looked into the functionality of iAboutClock and came up with a scheme to create dozens of similar apps. The following is Graham’s email response to the BrightHouse request  (LOL – pretty tame dude – but way to keep calm and not rip BrightHouse a new one). For more details about this bizarre incident, check out Satosoft’s article – Satosoft Says ‘No’ To BrightHouse Labs.

Chris,

Thanks for your interest. I’m unable to take this conversation any further, for two specific reasons;

  1. You mention below that you are looking to provide a small payment for this. As mentioned in my previous email, I’ve never considered doing this, especially for what would be a sum of money so small, that it would be insulting.
  2. Secondly, yet more importantly, we’ve done some research on your company, having never heard of you before. To be brutally honest, satosoft.com would never be associated with the type of company you are. The damage to our high value brand would be too great. Your company’s method of producing multiple, almost identical apps, flooding the iTunes App Store with what we consider to be questionable quality, is far, far below the ethical standards that we live by.

I wish you the best of luck in your ventures.

Regards

Graham

August 19, 2009 | Filed Under News | 15 Comments 

The Daily Show Spotlights iFart Legal Battle – LMAO

Fart_War Ok, so you probably are aware of the lawsuit brewing between iFart and Pull My Finger. Yup, you heard right … FART APPS battling it out with expensive lawyers before a judge in a court of law … WTF?!? We’re not going to belabor the story … you can check out all the “juicy” details at CNET (told you it was serious – even CNET is carrying the news).

This whole fart smack down thing is just too funny to take seriously. And that’s why we want to share with you this hysterical clip from The Daily Show With Jon Stewart … it’s LMAO madness and will certainly raise a few eyebrows when Pull My Finger creator, Eric Stratton, compares his app’s accomplishments to the legendary and first African-American MLB player of the modern era, Jackie Robinson … WTF?!?

August 1, 2009 | Filed Under Entertainment, News | 14 Comments 

More Rejections From Apple – I Can Has Cheezburger

We have a new pastime! Besides uncovering the biggest Sacks Of Suck in the App Store, we enjoy sharing the Dumbest Of Dumbass app rejections by Apple. It’s sort of like collecting baseball cards … we find apps that were rejected for the most moronic rationale (Minipops, Hotdog Down A Hallway, etc.) and display them in our baseball card album … ICHC_logo errr … KRAPPS web site. A fun and entertaining little hobby …  thanks Apple!

Our latest reject derives from the extremely popular I Can Has Cheezburger (ICHC) network of humor web sites … stuff like
FAIL Blog, Lolcats, etc. The ICHC app launched October 2008 as an extension of the network and displays content from all nine ICHC sites. The app is
uber-slick and developer Mike Cohen did a kick ass job coding it.

ICHC_Screen1 ICHC_Screen3 ICHC_Screen2

Now like any good developer, Mike was not satisfied with his first release. So in June, he submitted an update to Apple which would add a bunch of really cool features like Shake To Shuffle, Movie Support and more. But similar to many of his comrades … Apple delivered their famous epic nut shot squarely in Mike’s balls. Why? Because Apple determined that the images within the ICHC app are not suitable for kids under the age of 17:

Thank you for submitting I Can Has Cheezburger (Ad Free) to the App Store. We’ve reviewed I Can Has Cheezburger (Ad Free) and determined that we cannot post this version of your iPhone application to the App Store at this time because it is not appropriately rated. Our review indicates that the application content is not consistent with the current rating because it contains sexual content and mature or suggestive themes.

 

Please visit iTunes Connect to resubmit your binary and rate your application appropriately.

The kind folks at Apple forwarded a few images (see below) they felt were not age appropriate to ICHC’s current 9+ rating – all originating from the FAIL Blog site.

ICHC_Reject1   ICHC_Reject2

Fair enough … if Apple feels this material is not appropriate for 9+, so be it. But it sucks they were initially cool with the app being rated 9+, only to change their mind during a routine update approval. But whatever … developer Mike rolled with the punches and came up with a great solution – since the questionable content was from the FAIL Blog site, he added a code which filtered content to display only G-Rated material. A creative and brilliant solution MickeyMouseKick that would even make Apple smile …. NOT!

Mike received basically the same rejection letter from Apple, stating the content is frequently mature and suggestive in nature and thus should be rated 17+. Apple failed to include any examples of the offensive material, leaving Mike thinking – “WTF” … it’s like Apple didn’t  even review the app the second time … even Mickey Freaking Mouse would love this
G-Rated version and pimp it to all his 9 year old Mouseketeers. Not exactly sure why Mike needed to be kicked in his balls again when all he did was follow Apple’s rules. Obviously a 17+ rating would tank the app, not to mention there are significant problems developers face with a 17+ rated app … Shut Up Mike! No Update For You!

Unfortunately, Mike is not the only victim of dipshit Apple rejections. Developers are becoming increasingly confused, discouraged and pissed off.  So what’s a dev to do? … develop Android apps as (Fake) Steve Jobs suggests (read his hysterical article)? Perhaps, but a group of resourceful folks are debating an Act of Solidarity to send Apple the message that their approval process sucks big time. Will they be heard? Will it be enough? Who knows … but it’s pretty pathetic that Apple’s lifeline (the dev’s) has to even consider this grassroots approach. Something is broken, why won’t Apple just fix the damn thing?

July 21, 2009 | Filed Under News | 42 Comments 

Thank You KRAPPS Sponsors

2b9fe0ddd987caac_o We would like to take a brief timeout to thank our valued sponsors. Without their support, there would be no KRAPPS (uh, that doesn’t sound right). All these peeps are solid folks, have quality products and we’re proud to be aligned with them. So support KRAPPS, show our sponsors some love … you’ll become a better person.

Be Seen With KRAPPS
KRAPPS is the only web site dedicated to iPhone humor and fun. Take advantage of our unique niche by advertising on KRAPPS. We offer four different sponsorship packages to ensure participation at every budget level. Contact us at info@KRAPPS.com to receive our media kit, rate card and to secure your advertising placement.

—————————————————————————————————————————-

screen_5 Ow My Balls!
Ow My Balls! is a hysterical iPhone game centered around the mishaps of Joe The Juggler. Kick Juggler Joe off the ledge of a tall building … and he cries out – “OW MY BALLS!” As Joe falls, hit objects to score points and ignite the fart jetpack to make him travel the longest distance possible before making impact with the ground and crying out - 
“OW MY BALLS!” This high quality game contains outstanding hand-drawn graphics, hilarious custom recorded sounds and user-friendly controls. Plus you have the ability to record your own “OW MY BALLS!” sound effect to use within the game. A bargain at only 99 cents … click here to purchase OW MY BALLS via iTunes or read our extensive review.

ifightthankyouGIF iFight Pro
This app is a blast! To really appreciate iFight Pro [iTunes], click here and take a quick look at a demonstration video – it’s really cool. Combine a handgun, rifle, shotgun, slap, whip, gong, sword or punch with one of the eight background music tracks – and you’ll be awarded with a pure quality, enormously fun iPhone app.

100soundsThankYou 100sounds
There’s a reason 100sounds [iTunes] is the #1 soundboard app … cuz it rocks! This app not only provides hundreds of high quality originally recorded sound effects, but also includes loop and delay effects for all your comedic purposes. Plus you can get hundreds of ringtones emailed to you, automatically, at no extra charge! 100sounds was already a bargain at $0.99, so this enhancement makes it a great deal! Click here to view web site, be sure to check out the hysterical user-submitted videos or click here to read our detailed review.

DrinkTracker Ad DrinkTracker – The Breathalyzer iPhone App
Don’t drink and drive! True words, but easier said than done. This is where DrinkTracker [iTunes] comes into play – your personal “alcohol conscious” – helping you to drink responsibly. DrinkTracker calculates your blood alcohol content (BAC) based on your profile and updates every 60 seconds. This is an extremely feature-rich breathalyzer app and at $1.99, a no-brainer bargain buy. Click here for our review or visit the DrinkTracker site for complete details and a fantastic demo video.

Wordulous 99 Games
99 Games is an exceptional game developer cranking out such iPhone classics as WordsWorth (ranked as high #1 in the word game category), Chess Pro, Chess Lite, Aqua Jigsaw, and Jigsaw Wild. Their latest offering is Wordulous … an anagram like no others: multiple modes, global scores, Facebook Connect and more. 99 Games is committed to building only the highest quality and most entertaining games possible … all at affordable prices. Click here for our review.

July 19, 2009 | Filed Under anti-KRAPPS, News | 6 Comments 

LMAO Video From FlyChat

FlyChat_Logo Yesterday, one of the strangest, most bizarre applications arrived in the iPhone App Store … the flyChat app. It has something to do with sending messages to random strangers via buzzing flies within flyChat’s unique social network. Weird stuff … which we haven’t took the time to quite digest (“I know an old lady who swallowed a fly –
I don’t know why she swallowed a fly” – it’s a kiddy story, come on, never heard of it?). If you want to check more of flyChat out, TechCrunch and Mashable have good write ups … and of course you can visit flyChat’s site where you’ll find detailed (way geeky) diagrams about this messenger fly thing.

Now the point of this story is not to discuss flyChat … but to share the equally bizarre, strange and disturbing flyChat promo video. Again, not really sure WTF they are talking about … but the Fly In A Suit character is freaking nuts and the Old Deaf Man plays an equally entertaining supporting actor role. Crazy funny shit from flyChat! …
HELLO – McFLY?!? (it’s a movie, come on, never heard of it?)

 

July 18, 2009 | Filed Under Entertainment, News, Social | 3 Comments 

Developer Steals iPhone App Code, Submits As Own

mr_nice_guy Meet Brandon Trebitowski. He’s a nice guy. You know, the kind of guy who lets you cut ahead of him in a grocery store checkout line if you have fewer items. The kind of guy who holds the door open for you. The kind of guy who sees a wandering dog and attempts to locate its owner. Yeah, that’s Brandon … he’s a nice guy.

Brandon is also a geek. He develops iPhone web apps and has released the Cost Per Square Foot Calculator and the Daily Calorie apps. While learning to code these apps, Brandon noticed there was a severe lack of iPhone programming tutorials on the web. So being the nice guy he is, Brandon started the iCodeBlog to assist other developers and share his programming knowledge.

One of Brandon’s most popular articles is the “iPhone Game Programming Tutorial” in which he gives step-by-step instructions on how to build an iPhone game called iTennis (a Pong-style game). The iTennis tutorial includes everything the aspiring developer will need to build the game … graphics, sounds, game mechanics and of course, the code.

iCodeBlog2

So one day when Brandon was taking a break from doing nice things, he came across a Pong-style iPhone game called iTennis. Hmmm … Pong-style iPhone game … iTennis … WTF – this is nice guy Brandon’s app … being sold by BlaBlaIncTech for 99 cents a download. BlaBlaIncTech lifts the nice guy code, graphics, sounds, etc … get’s Apple’s approval and positions themselves to profit of a freaking tutorial. Wow … talk about a total DOUCHE BAG.

iTennisFINAL

youdouchebag Oh and save the bullshit legalize debate of public domain vs. copyright infringement. We’re talking about right vs. wrong … we’re talking about morals, ethics and principles (oh that’s right, we forgot … big business has no ethics … LOL). If you think lifting a tutorial code and selling it for profit is all good … well then you are a total DOUCHE BAG as well (see, we knew the youDB app would come in handy).

Be sure to read Brandon’s firsthand account of the imposter iTennis app over at his web site. We guess our only question to Apple is … do nice guys finish last?

July 9, 2009 | Filed Under Games, News | 39 Comments 

Thank You KRAPPS Sponsors

We would like to take a brief timeout to thank our valued sponsors. Without their support, there would be no KRAPPS (uh, that doesn’t sound right). All these peeps are solid folks, have quality products and we’re proud to be aligned with them. So support KRAPPS, show our sponsors some love … you’ll become a better person.

Be Seen With KRAPPS
KRAPPS is the only web site dedicated to iPhone humor and fun. Take advantage of our unique niche by advertising on KRAPPS. We offer four different sponsorship packages to ensure participation at a variety of budget levels. Contact us at info@KRAPPS.com to receive our media kit, rate card and to secure your advertising placement.

ThankYouPres

—————————————————————————————————————————-

screen_5 Ow My Balls!
Ow My Balls! is a hysterical iPhone game centered around the mishaps of Joe The Juggler. Kick Juggler Joe off the ledge of a tall building … and he cries out – “OW MY BALLS!” As Joe falls, hit objects to score points and ignite the fart jetpack to make him travel the longest distance possible before making impact with the ground and crying out - 
“OW MY BALLS!” This high quality game contains outstanding hand-drawn graphics, hilarious custom recorded sounds and user-friendly controls. Plus you have the ability to record your own “OW MY BALLS!” sound effect to use within the game. A bargain at only 99 cents … click here to purchase OW MY BALLS via iTunes or read our extensive review.

ifightthankyouGIF iFight Pro
This app is a blast! To really appreciate iFight Pro [iTunes], click here and take a quick look at a demonstration video – it’s really cool. Combine a handgun, rifle, shotgun, slap, whip, gong, sword or punch with one of the eight background music tracks – and you’ll be awarded with a pure quality, enormously fun iPhone app.


hideNtweet22 hideNtweet
With the amount of garbage in the App Store, the FREE hideNtweet app is a breath of fresh air. It is a totally unique and original game specifically designed for the iPhone. Think the classic children’s game Hide And Seek … now bring Hide And Seek to the iPhone, couple that with GPS technology and Twitter … and voila – hideNtweet. Click here to read our review. Better yet, experience this extraordinary gaming experience yourself – click here to download via iTunes for FREE.

100soundsThankYou 100sounds
There’s a reason 100sounds [iTunes] is the #1 soundboard app … cuz it rocks! This app not only provides hundreds of high quality originally recorded sound effects, but also includes loop and delay effects for all your comedic purposes. Plus you can get hundreds of ringtones emailed to you, automatically, at no extra charge! 100sounds was already a bargain at $0.99, so this enhancement makes it a great deal! Click here to view web site, be sure to check out the hysterical user-submitted videos.

DrinkTracker Ad DrinkTracker – The Breathalyzer iPhone App
Don’t drink and drive! True words, but easier said than done. This is where DrinkTracker [iTunes] comes into play – your personal “alcohol conscious” – helping you to drink responsibly. DrinkTracker calculates your blood alcohol content (BAC) based on your profile and updates every 60 seconds. This is an extremely feature-rich breathalyzer app and at $1.99, a no-brainer bargain buy. Click here for our review or visit the DrinkTracker site for complete details and a fantastic demo video.

BinaryGameThankYou2 Binary Game
Simply put, this app makes you smarter! Binary Game gets your brain juices flowing and is a ton of fun. It’s an original game of binary math which is simple to play and highly addictive. The worldwide leader board satisfies the most uber-competitive gamer, while the Facebook Connect feature pleases those social types. Click here to read our review or click here to purchase from the App Store, click here.

Wordulous 99 Games
99 Games is an exceptional game developer cranking out such iPhone classics as WordsWorth (ranked as high #1 in the word game category), Chess Pro, Chess Lite, Aqua Jigsaw, and Jigsaw Wild. Their latest offering is Wordulous … an anagram like no others: multiple modes, global scores, Facebook Connect and more. 99 Games is committed to building only the highest quality and most entertaining games possible … all at affordable prices. Click here for our review.

July 5, 2009 | Filed Under anti-KRAPPS, News, Uncategorized | Leave a Comment 

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