Taito Corp. Launches Seven Space Invaders-Themed Utility Apps, All Free

Gotta love TAITO Corporation! Despite these folks being so old that they fart dust … they have fully embraced the iPhone platform.

Check this … TAITO, the original sellers of Space Invaders back in 1978, have brought their retro magic to the iPhone. No were not talking about  the excellent Space Invaders iPhone games … we’re talking FREE Space Invaders-themed utility apps. Think calculator, flashlight, battery meter, etc. … those boring apps that get released by the thousands and can be described as “same shit, different day”. However today the shit is different … the clever peeps at TAITO have brilliantly extended their Space Invaders brand to FREE line of utility apps …

SI-Timer

SI-Flashlight

SI-Clock

Space Invaders Clock [iTunes FREE] – each minute an alien is blown up
Space Invaders Battery Meter [iTunes FREE]
Space Invaders Business Card [iTunes FREE]
Space Invaders Calculator [iTunes FREE]
Space Invaders Flashlight [iTunes FREE]
Space Invaders Memory Status [iTunes FREE]
Space Invaders Timer [iTunes FREE] – perfect for cooking ramen    

SI-Calculator  SI-Clock-2

Now these apps aren’t exactly the greatest thing since Shazam or Tap Tap Revenge, however considering the FREE price tag and the uber-cool Space Invaders theme, they are all good (although the clock would be even sicker if TAITO updated it with an alarm).

Of the seven apps, our favorite is the Space Invaders Business Card which allows users to make custom cards. These business cards can then be exchanged with other users via a Bluetooth connection … which is cool, but we’d love to see some Bump technology integrated into the app for a more universal transfer method.

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SI-Exchange

Once you collect contact information from other Space Invaders Business Card users, phone calls and emails can be launched directly from within the app … and when you tap on a Twitter name, the app displays the contact’s most recent tweets.

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So hopefully these Space Invader utility apps are a start of a new trend. The App Store sure could use some more wicked cross-over apps like Doodle Jump Tip Calculator or Pocket God Sex Positions … we would love to see those cute little pygmies demonstrate oral, face to face and rear entry positions

Apple Loses One Million As Users Create 1,000,000 AutoRingtone Ringtones

No Tie Software’s AutoRingtone service has created over ONE MILLION custom Text-To-Speech talking ringtones since November 2009. That means AutoRingtone apps have potentially cost Apple over ONE MILLION Dollars … considering that Apple charges up to $1.29 per ringtone. It’s no wonder Apple hasn’t featured the AutoRingtone app!

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The AutoRingtone service enables users to create their own talking "Caller ID" ringtones, that say exactly what they want – uncensored … "Hey Mike, Steve Jobs is calling. He needs your advice yet again about a lost iPhone. Should I let it go to voicemail?"

Users can select from dozens of professional (British Man, Woman, Old Man, GPS Gal, etc.) and funny voices (Jersey Girl, Valley Girl, Space Alien). They can use nearly 200 sound effects as an introduction, to get a user’s attention. There are no limitations… users can create unlimited ringtones and ringtones are completely uncensored. Indeed, many users are taking advantage of that feature (hint, hint).

autoringtonepro

Ringtones are downloadable in both .m4r as well as .aiff format … so they can be created on an iPhone, iPod touch or iPad but used on iPhones as well as other phones.

To jump on the uncensored custom ringtones ONE MILLION bandwagon, check these out:
AutoRingtone Pro [iTunes $0.99
9,999 Ringtones Uncensored Pro [iTunes $0.99]
Auto TTS Pro Text-To-Speech Ringtones [iTunes $0.99]

For more information about the AutoRingtone service, check out the hysterical video below called … AutoRingtone: Behind the Curtain.

 

Apple Loses Their Sense Of Humor, Rejects Lost In A Bar App

lost iPhone Gizmodo By now you’ve probably heard about the lost iPhone 4G saga – Apple employee gets drunk and loses the iPhone 4G prototype in a bar … some dude finds the lost iPhone and sells it  to Gizmodo … Gizmodo publishes the exclusive story and pictures … Apple gets pissed and Gizmodo returns the iPhone to Apple … police raid Gizmodo editor Jason Chen’s home and seize computers as part of an investigation into the leak of the prototype iPhone … blah, blah, blah.

Well the kind folks at Headlight Software (developers of Knife Dancing [iTunes FREE] – the #1 game in in February 2010) thought they would lend a hand to all drunks and publish an app which would help any lost iPhone return to its rightful owner.

The concept is simple … users create a custom wallpaper for display on their iPhone’s "locked" screen. The wallpaper contains the owner’s contact information … an email or phone number … easily visible if the phone is found, even if a passcode lock is used.

Lost-In-A-Bar-1  Lost-In-A-Bar-2

Simple concept … yet brilliant. And with Apple’s track record of losing prototypes, a must buy for all employees (and part of every Apple wallpaper message should read – “$5,000 Reward For Return! No Questions Asked!”).

Now the beauty of this whole story is that Headlight Software has MAJOR BALLS. These guys developed the “recover lost iPhone” app and submitted it to Apple for approval under the name … Lost In A Bar. Below are the actual screenshots and icon (love it) submitted to Apple …

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LMAO – classic stuff! Yeah, we’re sure you can guess what happens next …

Reeking of extreme arrogance and self-importance, Apple rejects the Lost In A Bar app claiming it’s “inappropriate”. WEAK … looks like the iPhone prototype was not the only thing they lost in a bar … WTF, where’s your sense of humor Apple?!? 

But drunk people rejoice! A non-offensive, positive and appropriate “recover lost iPhone”  application is already in the App Store … download Reward For Return [iTunes $0.99] and party on.

iPhone Can Now Determine Ripeness Of Watermelons

Developers never cease to amaze us. With nearly 200,000 applications available for download … and just when you think there really is an app for everything … some ingenious developer comes along and publishes an original app that makes you go, “damn, why didn’t I think of that?”

Last weekend we had yet another one of those “Ok This Time There Really Is An App For Everything” moments  … as iWatermelon Deluxe was launched on Saturday.

iWatermelon-Splash

The premise of iWatermelon Deluxe is simple … use your iPhone to determine the ripeness of a watermelon (yeah, why didn’t we think of that?). In three easy steps, you’ll be like Superman using his X-ray vision … peering deep in the bowels of the underhalls watermelon. Just place your iPhone on top of the desired watermelon … step 1 – select the melon’s size … step 2 – select its color …

iWatermelon-1  iWatermelon-2

step 3 – tap the melon three times. iWatermelon Deluxe will then analyze the resulting sound using a unique custom made formula for determining whether the watermelon is unripe, fair or nectar of the gods.

iWatermelon-3  iWatermelon-4

At 99 cents, iWatermelon Deluxe [iTunes] provides solid value, a lifetime of sweetness and perhaps even romance. Since they say the grocery store is a great place to hook up with other singles … using your iPhone in the fruit aisle just might be the ultimate turn on for geek-like minds.

[hooray for us! not a single sexual innuendo in the entire melons article … HA]

Sexy Pamela Anderson Launches Her Own Sexy App – Wakey Wakey

Have you noticed a change in KRAPPS lately? Yeah … we’re happier, more peaceful and generally in high spirits. No, we didn’t quit smoking (actually we don’t smoke – we just said that for effect) … we scored Pamela FREAKING Anderson! Yup … every morning like clockwork, we wake up with Pamela FREAKING Anderson! Oh and it’s so awesome … the sight of her rockin’ body – the sound of her sexy voice … Pamela FREAKING Anderson, what more could a guy want each and every morning?

And when we said “every morning like clockwork” we really meant it … like literally, we really meant it … like the new Pamela Anderson iPhone video alarm clock app by Creative Licence (not a typo) Digital —> Wakey Wakey.

wakey-wakey-title

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Although it looks like your typical alarm app, Wakey Wakey is a video alarm clock with a difference. Every morning, Pamela’s voice will rouse you from your sleep … she’s playful, sensual and very flirtatious … “honey, wake up – good morning sweetie – come on baby, wake up sexy.”

Pamela-Anderson-iPhone-6

Pamela-Anderson-iPhone-4

And then, as you wake up pleasantly from your rest … feast your eyes on the iPhone screen as the world famous curves of Pamela Anderson wrapped in sexy lingerie appear from beneath the sheets (in high-resolution video, of course).

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Treat yourself to any of the five titillating wake up videos … from the geeky “Hard Drive”, to the eco-friendly “Shower Together” or our fave, “Frozen Waffle” which has something to do with Pamela’s panties in our freezer <blush>.  

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Wakey Wakey is Pamela’s first official iPhone app … and like her, it’s smokin’ hot. All videos were shot exclusively for this app on location in Tufnell Park, London. During the steamy shoot, Pamela kept delivering zingers such as …

>>>  “Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine I’d wake up with so many strangers”
>>> “I’ve always had trouble getting guys out of bed so I can’t guarantee this will work”
>>> ”I love getting a rise out of people so I couldn’t resist this project”
>>> ”I wish they’d let me say ‘cock-a-doodle-do’”

[oh that Pamela … she’s a funny one … a regular David Letterman]

So there you have it … from Baywatch to your bedroom … no need to keep fantasizing. Just get Wakey Wakey and wake up happy happy with Pamela FREAKING Anderson.

[HA – look at that! we wrote the entire article without a single “Morning Wood” or “Whacky Whacky” reference. HA!]

 

Apple Censors The Word ‘Uncensored’ – Huh?

Shut-Up-Oprah This just in … the word "Uncensored" has been censored … Playboy app still for sale.

We are fans of No Tie Software’s family of TEXT-TO-SPEECH ringtone creation apps, sold under the name AutoRingtone but also Ringtones Uncensored [iTunes], to reflect that you have the right to type ANYTHING you want and have it spoken as a ringtone.  Want a ringtone that says "Shut Up Oprah"? You got it!  Want one that says you love Oprah? Go for it.  That’s what uncensored means … freedom of speech.  The app itself contains NO objectionable content, but just like Apple’s Notepad or Email apps, you are free to type anything you want.

Ringtones-Uncensored

So, when we asked No Tie if they had an iPad version of Ringtones Uncensored coming, it was ironic to hear that they had to change their app’s name, when submitting it for the iPad!

Uncensored Bad

The word "Uncensored" was itself censored, despite appearing in "Family Guy", "Katt Williams" and other iPhone apps.  Is this due to the publicity that iPad apps will be getting or just an overzealous reviewer with different priorities?  Nobody knows.  But No Tie turned lemons into lemonade and rebadged the iPad version as Freedom Of SpeechTones  [iTunes $1.99]. Only in America!

Censored Uncensored

So, if you believe in freedom of speech, or you like speech synthesis, or you’re just sick of guessing which song is for which contact, pick up the iPhone or iPad version and take a stand for freedom!

aPad – A Sensible Alternative To The iPad

Can’t wait for an iPad? Don’t have $500 to drop on one? No worries … there’s an app for that (of course there is)! No Tie Software, same folks who make the uncensored AutoRingtone TEXT-TO-SPEECH ringtone application, have unleashed a very nostalgic app … aPad of Paper [iTunes].

aPad-Title

aPad lets you download PDF-format "pads" suitable for printing, with different paper types. Go old school with Parchment or send your kid to class with a pad of Lined paper. There’s even Graph paper for the hardcore geek types.

aPad-1  aPad-2

Spoiler alert! The "battery indicator" is a tree log … after all, aPads do indeed grow on trees!

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The aPad offers many things Apple’s iPad does not. Unlimited battery life … survives a 6 foot drop … outstanding aerodynamic properties (when folded properly). Plus something rare on the App Store … all the porn you want … as long as you can draw it. And it’s as thin as a sheet of paper – because that’s what it is!

So be a hit at the next office meeting when you whip out your own aPad! Anyone can buy an iPad but the aPad is so exclusive, you can’t buy it. Because it’s FREE!

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