• 
• 
• 

• Search

• SUBSCRIBE

   get KRAPPS by RSS

  or, get KRAPPS by email:
  
  

• Recently Written

  • Here’s To The Crazy Ones
  • Despite Female Moans, SexLife Trailer Fails To Arouse [Video]
  • Wii iPhone 4 iOS Home & Lock Screen Wallpaper Set [Download]
  • Slap A Sexy Belly, Make Music, Huh? – Belly Jam iPhone App [Video]
  • Adventure, To The Max! [iPhone Game Review]
  • epic – The Toolbox iPhone iOS 4 Home & Lock Screen Wallpaper Set [Download]
  • Recap Week Of January 3
  • Sexy Star Wars Pinups – EWWW!
  • Weird Stuff From Japan – iPhone 4 Sushi Case
  • MegaMan iPhone iOS 4 Home Screen Wallpaper Collection [Download]

• Categories

  • anti-KRAPPS
  • Books
  • Business
  • Education
  • Entertainment
  • Finance
  • Games
  • General
  • Guest Authors
  • Health
  • Lifestyle
  • Music
  • Navigation
  • News
  • Photography
  • Productivity
  • Quick KRAPPS
  • Recap
  • Reference
  • Social
  • Sports
  • Travel
  • Uncategorized
  • Utilities
  • Weather

• Archives

  • August 2011
  • January 2011
  • December 2010
  • November 2010
  • October 2010
  • September 2010
  • August 2010
  • July 2010
  • June 2010
  • May 2010
  • April 2010
  • March 2010
  • February 2010
  • January 2010
  • December 2009
  • November 2009
  • October 2009
  • September 2009
  • August 2009
  • July 2009
  • June 2009
  • May 2009
  • April 2009
  • March 2009
  • February 2009
  • January 2009
  • December 2008
• 

High Expectations Asian Father Meme – plus Recap Week Of September 27

Subscribe to our RSS feed and/or download the 100% free KRAPPS iPhone app … it’ll make you feel better!

In case you missed any of our perfect iPhone chaos, quick links to this week’s articles.

September 27: Promiscuous Sex Now Convenient As Apple Approves Swingers Club Locator

September 28: Apple Reverses Its “ No Religious Humor” Policy, Approves Jesus Jump!

September 29: Orgasm Videos – The Ultimate In App Store Deception

September 30: Amazing – Mishka The Talking Husky Dog Sings Using iPad [Video]

October 1: This Booger Eating Promo Video Does Not Make Us Want To Buy The BoogerZ App

October 2: All Aboard! for First Class Fun [Train Conductor 2 iPhone Game Review]

—————————————————————————————————————————-

High Expectations Asian Father

LOL … love this meme about first-generation Asian parents being way over the top. For the complete collection, check out the High Expectations Asian Father website.

 

 

 

All Aboard! for First Class Fun [Train Conductor 2 iPhone Game Review]

(written by guest author Tim Giron. follow Tim on Twitter @timgiron)

Train Conductor 2: USA [iTunes $0.99] by The Voxel Agents has quickly become one of my favorite games, offering a pitch-perfect blend of sights, sounds and silky smooth gameplay all wrapped up in a universal app package.  The brief tutorial that starts things off introduces the game mechanics:  numbered trains enter from either side of the screen and you have to create a temporary switch to guide them to their correct track while avoiding collisions (you really don’t want an NTSB investigation clouding your resume).  Once you’ve got the hang of things, you’re off to Miami to take control of a beachside monorail system.  These are relatively slow moving trains, giving the player the a chance to improve their switching skills.  As the round progresses, faster moving express trains appear, keeping this location challenging.

Once you’ve safely delivered a certain number of trains, the next location on the map is opened up.  Nashville and it’s apparently haunted by the ghosts of long forgotten musicians.  I found this location to be the easiest for high scoring.  Since they are incorporeal, there are no collisions, but the red demon trains must be delivered to the correct track.  And these ghost trains move very fast.  Playing this level on the iPad, I found the multi-touch to be extremely responsive as I switched trains with both hands.

After scoring another hundred trains delivered, it’s time to visit the Big Apple where you are put in charge of 5 subway lines.  This was by far the most challenging location for me to play since you have to route the trains around pillars and the tracks are labeled with both numbers and letters.  This level requires an extreme amount of focus to navigate successfully.  The attention to detail that the developers have put into this game is really apparent in this level since the subway lines are authentically color-coded.

Once you’ve passed the 300 trains mark, it’s time for another trip into the ghost world for the next location: Las Vegas.  Here, the gameplay changes up a little bit since you aren’t switching the trains between the tracks.  Instead, you have to work a little pick-n-flick to save the ghosts before they fall into the traps set up at the center of the screen.  The entire game, and particularly this level, really gives your hand-eye coordination a workout.  It’s a great way to hyper-focus your noodle during a busy day!

At the 600 trains delivered mark, you get to visit my home state, Arizona, for a trip to the Grand Canyon, where you have to keep the steam trains from plunging into the gorge below (talk about pressure).  I should mention that you can revisit any of the locations that you have unlocked as well.  Since each level plays like it’s own game, it’s fun to pick and choose.  My daughters both love the game, but they each like different locations best.

I haven’t yet reached the score to unlock the Roswell, New Mexico location which was recently added, but I’m sure there are aliens involved.  Also planned for a future update is a Seattle trainyard.  The replay value of this game is very high and at 99 cents, this universal app is a steal.  I am quite surprised that the game isn’t in the top charts, since it is definitely in my top ten.

This Booger Eating Promo Video Does Not Make Us Want To Buy The BoogerZ App

Typically when a developer releases a promotional video for their application, its objective is to excite the viewer and entice them into purchasing the app. Sort of like watching a kick ass movie trailer … you can’t wait to see the movie upon release.

Recently, the folks at DeLoading released an iPhone game called BoogerZ. This app is a nifty little boogers and snot eating game in which the more tasty boogers you eat, the higher your score.

Now by their own admission, DeLoading warns potential buyers that BoogerZ is not a serious game and will only to appeal to “truly silly people”. Fair enough … we have plenty idiotic selections here on KRAPPS.

 

But what gets us is the BoogerZ promo video. Seriously, we’re no sticks in the mud … but damn, one can only take so much of watching people eat their boogers. This video contains nearly 3 minutes of nose picking … folks striking gold … and they chomping away on their nasal discoveries.

Look, we won’t blame you if you bounced without pushing play … hell, we could barely get through the entire presentation … then we threw up a little in our mouth.

Amazing – Mishka The Talking Husky Dog Sings Using iPad [Video]

Meet Mishka … a handsome 8-year-old Siberian Husky from the United States. But Mishka is no ordinary dog. Far from it – this is a talking dog! Heck, even better … Mishka is a talented singing Husky who puts most of today’s pop artists to shame <Bieber>.

With help from the magical iPad and the La Di Da application, Mishka the Talking Husky performs an auto-tuned canine classic that’s sure to make more than a few bubble gum artists <Bieber> a run for their money. Check out Master Mishka at work …

 

And speaking of a run for their money … Mishka’s pop single Mishka’s Song, just dropped on iTunes this week. At 99 cents, we hope Mishka’s Song will gross more than that annoying teenage freak’s <Bieber> sorry excuse for music.

ROCK ON MISHKA … next stop = Glee!

 

(via urlesque)

Orgasm Videos – The Ultimate In App Store Deception

Now granted, in most cases you should probably know better … but we just have to scratch our heads at the misleading shit Apple is allowing into the App Store. Steve Jobs keeps proclaiming … “We Love Our Users”. Yeah … sure thing Steve, we love you too … thanks for having our back!

For $1.99, the Orgasm Videos application (yes, this is a real app) promises just that … orgasm videos. It comes heavily branded with “WARNING – FOR ADULTS ONLY – 17+” disclaimers and descriptive text that reads like the cover of a Kim Kardashian sex tape …

Includes Actual Videos!!!

Orgasm Videos includes quality videos with quality audio.

Watch these videos for your own pleasure!

Holy Big O, Batman! How can any red-blooded manly man resist such temptations as … Clitoral Orgasm videos – Female Ejaculation videos – or Multiple Orgasm videos? And there’s so much more the developers CANNOT EVEN DESCRIBE!!!

Now you know that expression … if something sounds too good to be true, it usually is. Well it applies perfectly to the Orgasm Videos application nonsense. So before curiosity kills the kinky cat and wastes its two dollars … Orgasm Videos is simply a collection of publically available YouTube videos in which middle age women sit around and talk about sex.

Haha – as misleading as this may sound, Apple indeed loves you … sucka!

Apple Reverses Its “ No Religious Humor” Policy, Approves Jesus Jump!

In May 2009, shortly after receiving extremely bad press in regards to the Baby Shaker application, Apple rejected an iPhone app called Me So Holy. The app would have enabled users to superimpose their faces on images of religious figures like Jesus, the Pope, Mother Teresa and others. Me So Holy was rejected based on Section 3.3.12 of the iPhone SDK agreement …

“Applications must not contain any obscene, pornographic, offensive or defamatory content or materials of any kind … that in Apple’s reasonable judgment may be found objectionable by iPhone or iPod Touch users.”

LMAO … boy how times have changed! Doing a 180 reversal on their previous “No Religious Humor” policy, Apple has approved the first app which uses Jesus outside of serious religious context … Jesus Jump.

From the makers of such fine applications such as Fail Tattoos, Justin Bieber Fashion and Banned Wedding Portraits … Jesus Jump is yet another Doodle Jump-like game staring Jesus as the main character. The game’s objective is simple, help Jesus bounce his way  into Heaven. Per the app’s description …

On the third day, Jesus resurrected and floated into the sky to his kingdom in Heaven.

 

Now you can help Jesus get to heaven! Tilt your iPhone/iPod/iPad left or right to move Jesus through the clouds. While making his way to Heaven, you can find bonus items to achieve a higher score! Don’t let Jesus fall or the game is over!

 

So now that it’s clear (we use the term loosely – with Apple nothing is clear) religious humor is no longer considered blasphemy or offensive by Apple … does this mean the return of Me So Holy and a wave of other divine parodies? Only time will tell WWSJD?

Promiscuous Sex Now Convenient As Apple Approves Swingers Club Locator

Back in July 2009, Apple approved the first strip club locator application, Gentleman’s Club Finder. These days, using your iPhone to find adult entertainment is easier than Craigslist … as there are plenty of apps which help you discover the nearest nudie bar.

But gosh darn, strip clubs can get so boring and soon enough, you’ll be longing for something more kinky. Good news … Apple hears you … and over the weekend, they decided to kink it up a notch by approving the Swingers Club app.

Catering to couples and singles, Swingers Club is the first and only swingers club finder in the App Store. For a mere $3.99, you’ll receive access to hundreds of clubs in all 50 States. Addresses, phone numbers, websites and more … all critical information is listed in Swingers Club, including rules and descriptions of each “lifestyle establishment” so you know exactly what to expect when arriving at the “social gathering”.

 

Looking to hook up and engage in sexual activities like wife swapping, group sex or promiscuous activities? Oh you filthy feline … now there’s an app for that!

« Previous Page — Next Page »

• 
• 
• 

• Social KRAPPS

  • Email
  • Twitter
  • FriendFeed
  • Flickr
  • YouTube
• 
• 
• 
•