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Jersey Shore Photo App, Jersify, Is Now FREE [T-Shirt Giveaways]

Earlier this year, we featured a … juiced up – over-tanned – pit-stained – fist pumping … app called Jersify [iTunes FREE]. This photo application has the revolutionary capability of  unleashing the Guido or Guidette in anyone … including Apple’s beloved co-founder Steve Jobs. With the help of Jersify, Steve Jobs becomes the ultimate Guido … “Sleazy T”.

 

Or how about Conan O’Brien? Yeah, that’s it … Coco is way sexier as a Guido.

 

With over 100 overlay options like Fedora hats, Yankees caps, Vercase and Prada shades, Fohawk hair, gold chains, the F you and more … the Jersify app provides an authentic Italian-American Muscle Milk look within minutes … including bronzer functionality for that gorgeous fake and bake synthetic tan appeal. 

   

Jersify has just received an update, making this the most comprehensive and badass Jersey Shore-themed application available for the iPhone. Check out these features …

-> Gleamin’ white teeth whitener functionality
-> Three explicit FFFFUUUU hand gestures (the F you, the F you closeup, the double F you)
-> Guido Gallery … upload, browse and rate other Jersified photos
-> Jersify Smash Board featuring top rated photos
-> Share via email, Twitter, Facebook or though the new Guido Gallery

 

JERSIFY FREE FOR A LIMITED TIME
Typically Jersify is an absolute bargain at 99 cents … but apparently the developers are drunk and have lowered the price of Jersify to FREE [iTunes FREE]! We suggest you click here immediately and download Jersify for FREE … before the developers sober up and come to their senses.

GIVEAWAY – Jersey Shore “Grenade Free Foundation” T-Shirts
Jersify developer, CanaryCreations, was kind enough to give us two Jersey Shore-themed “Grenade Free Foundation” t-shirts … we are kind enough to give them to two lucky KRAPPS viewers. To enter the giveaway, tweet the following by 11:59pm PST Monday, October 11:

GIVEAWAY –> Enter to win a Jersey Shore t-shirt! And get the Jersify iPhone app for FREE. Visit @KRAPPS for details http://krps.us/a0Cb7s

Two winners will be chosen randomly from entries and announced via Twitter on Tuesday, October 12. Follow us on Twitter – @KRAPPS – so that we can notify you via direct message if you win. One entry per Twitter account. Good luck!

Really Apple? ‘Lesbian Videos’ And ‘Breast Videos’ Approved For Sale

Yet another proud “WTF Moment” from the brainiacs in Cupertino …

If Apple is so against selling overtly sexual applications in the App Store, why on earth would they approve the Lesbian Videos and Breast Videos apps? From their title, to description, to screenshots … these apps represent everything Apple is so dead set against. Bravo Apple … way to keep your business strategy and rulings consistent.

Lesbian Videos
The app starts by grabbing your attention … WARNING – FOR ADULTS ONLY – 17+ … then continues to read like a best seller from Vivid …

Lesbian – sexual and romantic desire between females
HOT Lesbians – Lesbian Lovers – Teen Lesbians
Blondes, Brunettes, and Redheads – Multiple Partners – In the Bed, on the Couch

At $1.99, it’s impossible for any penis carrying human to resist such temptation. And bravo to the developers … in just three days after release, the titillating title and arousing description vaulted Lesbian Videos to #4 in the Lifestyle category. As if another “Sex Sells” proof point was needed.

Breast Videos
This one takes us back to the App Store’s glory days … with applications like Epic Boobs, Asian Boobs and Boob Trading Cards (we still cherish our Kim Kardashian rookie boob card – so cute) why even bother with some witty title? Just give ‘em what they want … BOOBIES!

Racks, tits and boobs! It’s time to see some female breasts in BREAST VIDEOS!
HOT WOMEN – Real Breasts – LARGE Breasts – Fake Silicone Breasts – Small Breasts

Oh … just in case you’re not very familiar with boobs … Breast Videos gives a useful educational tidbit about erect nipples (gee thanks) …

And finally, let’s not forget about another fine video collection we featured just last week …

Orgasm Videos

Now before you get all hot and bothered by Lesbian Breast Orgasm Videos, please note … Apple seems to have lax standards when it comes to accurate app descriptions. Actually let’s just call a spade a spade … Lesbian Breast Orgasm Videos are 100% MISLEADING (thanks Apple). Don’t believe us … check out horny dude who bought the Lesbian Videos application … the same review can be applied to the other apps as well. OUCH!

HELP! There’s A Transvestite Trapped In My iPhone – PeekaBoo Tranny App

If you thought photobombing squirrels were annoying … count your blessings you haven’t crossed paths with a transvestite. Freaking tranny bitches … loud, obnoxious and all drama. Worse is when they get stuck inside your iPhone. Besides putting the full whack on your antenna’s reception … these tranny skanks demand to be the center of attention and mysteriously appear in every photo opportunity. Our iPhone’s camera roll is filled with these so-called peekaboo trannys.

But don’t make an appointment with the Genius Bar. This is not a defect … this is the only tranny app available for the iPhone … this is PeekaBoo Tranny.

Meet Trina, ChiChi, Jazmine, Rhea and Gail … the girls of PeekaBoo Tranny. These saucy mommas will randomly appear as photobomb overlays when taking a picture with the app … magically turning your images from somber to sass. Trina is included in the initial download … while the rest of the tranny bomb bitches are available via in-app purchase.

Now when we say randomly appear in your pictures … we really mean it. These trannys cannot be controlled, contained or positioned. Just point your camera, shoot … and pray your tranny will behave properly and photobomb the captured moment in an optimal manner. Hopefully the developers are not too busy duct taping their junk as an update which allows resizing and repositioning the peekaboo bomber would definitely be tranny-tastic.

Screw that well-known Hipstamatic photography app … <yawn> boring … check out PeekaBoo Tranny and listen to your iPhone holla from pain pleasure.

How To Spot An iPad Owner [Cartoon]

Oh those whacky iPad owners … they stick out like a sore thumb. And so true about us iPhone kooks … rarely in our pocket, we’re always looking obsessively at it.

(via Cartoonous)

Destroy Bedroom Spontaneity With The Sex Organizer App

Here’s a nickel’s worth of free advice …

Looking for a way to spice things up in the bedroom? … Try having more spontaneous sex. Want to continue in your sexual slump? … Use the Sex Organizer iPhone app.

Sex Organizer is the first complete sex planner for iPhone (and transforms users into droids). With features such as a sex calendar, sex diary, position planner and more … Sex Organizer promises a unique way to organize your sexual life. And if all this sexual organization isn’t enough … it has an integrated social media feature which allows the user to broadcast and share positions with friends via Twitter or Facebook (huh?).

Look, we get it. Kids, work, chores, etc. … most couple are busy, busy, busy. To avoid lovemaking ruts … organization and scheduling is necessary.

But there’s nothing better than just getting it on. No planning, no thinking … no Sex Organizer app … just spontaneous sex.

[stepping off our soapbox now]

High Expectations Asian Father Meme – plus Recap Week Of September 27

Subscribe to our RSS feed and/or download the 100% free KRAPPS iPhone app … it’ll make you feel better!

In case you missed any of our perfect iPhone chaos, quick links to this week’s articles.

September 27: Promiscuous Sex Now Convenient As Apple Approves Swingers Club Locator

September 28: Apple Reverses Its “ No Religious Humor” Policy, Approves Jesus Jump!

September 29: Orgasm Videos – The Ultimate In App Store Deception

September 30: Amazing – Mishka The Talking Husky Dog Sings Using iPad [Video]

October 1: This Booger Eating Promo Video Does Not Make Us Want To Buy The BoogerZ App

October 2: All Aboard! for First Class Fun [Train Conductor 2 iPhone Game Review]

—————————————————————————————————————————-

High Expectations Asian Father

LOL … love this meme about first-generation Asian parents being way over the top. For the complete collection, check out the High Expectations Asian Father website.

 

 

 

All Aboard! for First Class Fun [Train Conductor 2 iPhone Game Review]

(written by guest author Tim Giron. follow Tim on Twitter @timgiron)

Train Conductor 2: USA [iTunes $0.99] by The Voxel Agents has quickly become one of my favorite games, offering a pitch-perfect blend of sights, sounds and silky smooth gameplay all wrapped up in a universal app package.  The brief tutorial that starts things off introduces the game mechanics:  numbered trains enter from either side of the screen and you have to create a temporary switch to guide them to their correct track while avoiding collisions (you really don’t want an NTSB investigation clouding your resume).  Once you’ve got the hang of things, you’re off to Miami to take control of a beachside monorail system.  These are relatively slow moving trains, giving the player the a chance to improve their switching skills.  As the round progresses, faster moving express trains appear, keeping this location challenging.

Once you’ve safely delivered a certain number of trains, the next location on the map is opened up.  Nashville and it’s apparently haunted by the ghosts of long forgotten musicians.  I found this location to be the easiest for high scoring.  Since they are incorporeal, there are no collisions, but the red demon trains must be delivered to the correct track.  And these ghost trains move very fast.  Playing this level on the iPad, I found the multi-touch to be extremely responsive as I switched trains with both hands.

After scoring another hundred trains delivered, it’s time to visit the Big Apple where you are put in charge of 5 subway lines.  This was by far the most challenging location for me to play since you have to route the trains around pillars and the tracks are labeled with both numbers and letters.  This level requires an extreme amount of focus to navigate successfully.  The attention to detail that the developers have put into this game is really apparent in this level since the subway lines are authentically color-coded.

Once you’ve passed the 300 trains mark, it’s time for another trip into the ghost world for the next location: Las Vegas.  Here, the gameplay changes up a little bit since you aren’t switching the trains between the tracks.  Instead, you have to work a little pick-n-flick to save the ghosts before they fall into the traps set up at the center of the screen.  The entire game, and particularly this level, really gives your hand-eye coordination a workout.  It’s a great way to hyper-focus your noodle during a busy day!

At the 600 trains delivered mark, you get to visit my home state, Arizona, for a trip to the Grand Canyon, where you have to keep the steam trains from plunging into the gorge below (talk about pressure).  I should mention that you can revisit any of the locations that you have unlocked as well.  Since each level plays like it’s own game, it’s fun to pick and choose.  My daughters both love the game, but they each like different locations best.

I haven’t yet reached the score to unlock the Roswell, New Mexico location which was recently added, but I’m sure there are aliens involved.  Also planned for a future update is a Seattle trainyard.  The replay value of this game is very high and at 99 cents, this universal app is a steal.  I am quite surprised that the game isn’t in the top charts, since it is definitely in my top ten.

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