Porn Abundant In “I Show Off” App – Apple Fails To Enforce Their New Guidelines [NSFW]

apple-rules Nine-time Olympic gold medalist Carl Lewis once said …. “Life Is All About Timing” … we couldn’t agree more.

Yesterday, in an attempt to make the app review and approval process less arbitrary, Apple released a set of guidelines to its developers. This official document from Apple is pretty hysterical as they try to be all hip, cool and non-corporate with their language … “We have over 250,000 apps in the App Store. We don’t need any more fart apps.”

Apple has always had a zero-tolerance policy for porn and nudity in the App Store … frequently banning nudie apps which somehow managed to get by Apple’s watchful eye: 

06/25/09 – Hottest Girls … 07/01/09 – BeautyMeter … 07/30/09 – theXchange … 08/21/09 – Check myHottie … 09/15/09 – My X Girlfriend … 01/21/10 – forChan … 05/12/10 – Top Secret 2, Model Pose and Model Pose 2

Apple has now made their “No Porn Allowed” policy even clearer as Section 18 of the new App Store Review Guidelines document is dedicated to pornography …

18. Pornography
18.1 Apps containing pornographic material, defined by Webster’s Dictionary as "explicit descriptions or displays of sexual organs or activities intended to stimulate erotic rather than aesthetic or emotional feelings", will be rejected
18.2 Apps that contain user generated content that is frequently pornographic (ex "Chat Roulette" apps) will be rejected

Which brings us back to Carl’s “Life Is All About Timing” … LMAO … publish as many rules and guidelines as you want Apple, but if you can’t enforce them, your official policies don’t mean shit.

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I Show Off, by Blue Sky Software, is an iPhone app which has been around for the past seven months (and is about to get banned). It’s one of those user-generated content applications where you upload a picture from within the app … the developer approves it … the image is published to the app … and the user community votes it yay or nay.

i-show-off-5F  i-show-off-7F

The whole “approve images before going live” concept is sound … however in reality, it’s pretty ineffective … Apple has been burned way too many times by this workflow (see our list of banned apps 4 inches above). User-generated images frequently translate to nudes and porn … as evident in the buttload of naked chick pics within I Show Off that have been there for months (displayed are some of the “tamer” selections).

i-show-off-4F  i-show-off-6F

i-show-off-3F  i-show-off-8F

“We have over 250,000 apps in the App Store. We don’t need any more fart apps” … you betcha Apple … and we can’t wait to report the next fart app you approve following this “no more farts” guideline (wait for it … it’ll happen – after all, this is Apple we’re talking about).

September 10, 2010 | Filed Under Entertainment, Lifestyle, News | 4 Comments 

Recap: Week Of February 15 – plus Pee Without Noise Stool

iphone3g krapps 2 In case you missed any of our perfect iPhone chaos, quick links to this week’s articles.

February 15: Let’s Bounce – SpringFling iPhone Game Review

February 16: New iPhone App Proves Sex Doesn’t Always Sell

February 17: Successful Developer Does A 180, Attempts Publishing A Crap App

February 18: Whiten Yellow Teeth (waste your money) With This New iPhone App

February 19: Apple Drops The Final Bomb On Smut – All ‘Overtly Sexual’ Apps Removed

February 20: Spooky Spirits – Absent of Absinthe

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Pee Without Noise Stool
No offense ladies, but this is what happens when you foolishly employ an all-female R&D team … the Pee Without Noise Stool. Designed to eliminate urination noise and splash in one fair swoop … and as an added bonus … eliminate your manhood as well. Kneeling and peeing … yes, this totally makes sense, but you still have the problem of remembering to put the toilet seat down for your honey. Back to the drawing board ladies!

Pee-Stool-1   Pee-Stool-2

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Honestly, at $76 for the wooden Eco model or $98 for the polyurethane DX model, if anyone receives one of these ball-remover devices, our advice … cut your losses and just move on!

Pee-Stool-Eco  Pee-Stool-DX

February 21, 2010 | Filed Under Recap | Leave a Comment 

New iPhone Porn App Discovered – theXchange

(update 12:15 p.m. PST: porn is a very subjective term. one’s artistic and tasteful nude is another’s filth. while Apple is not 100% clear on their nudity policy, they are adamant about a porn free App Store. we added an additional image at the end of this article from theXchange app which should clearly convey pornography … while the image is censored, the blackout area contains male genitalia … couple that with the image’s “Hot Wanted” statement … it’s clear, Apple is certainly not achieving their goal.)

As a preface to this article, we would like to remind you of Apple spokesman Tom Neumayer’s, profound statement in response to nude photos found in the Hottest Girls app:

“Apple will not distribute applications that contain
inappropriate content, such as pornography”

Fair enough Tom … thank you for making that perfectly clear. So what happens just a few days later … BeautyMeter and its infamous 15-year-old topless girl makes headlines. Hmmm, so much for Tom’s clarity.

Now flash forward to today … July 30 … Tom – there you go again, shittin’ us with your Apple will not distribute blah, blah, blah crap … nah, these are totally appropriate:

theXchange_nude_1_censored   theXchange_nude_3_censored

theXchange_nude_2_censored   theXchange_nude_4_censored

theXchange_nude_5_censored   theXchange_nude_6_censored

Welcome to theXchange … where user generated nudity, pornography, explicit language and anything else you can think of as sexually inappropriate content, is King!

So what is this place that resembles the movie Caligula? Well theXchange was released by Jim Young as a virtual nightclub. People enter the club … chat with others, then attempt to earn and spend virtual coins to buy drinks or photos of other club members (gee, wonder what kind of pictures are exchanged in theXchange … puppy dogs and lollipops of course … but at least their over 15 years of age).

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Oh and of course, the “House Rules” … NO NUDE PHOTOS ALLOWED. Thanks for making that crystal clear Jim … man, you are just as money as Tim from Apple.

But here’s the best part … theXchange launched July 1 … same day the BeautyMeter app was yanked from the App Store due to its user generated nude photos. You would think that a similar user generated content-based app born July 1 (BeautyMeter D-Day) would know better and make an extra effort to police its uploads … but no … theXchange didn’t learn squat. But Jim, don’t feel bad … Apple also flunked that course – however to Apple’s credit, they make a helluv a lot more money than you and can afford the “F”.

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[thanks to our boy @ungeheier for the tip]

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July 30, 2009 | Filed Under Social | 95 Comments 

Update – Apple Pulls BeautyMeter App With Nude 15-Year-Old

BeautyMeterWebNotice update: 1:00 p.m. PST – BeautyMeter developer has posted a message on their site indicating they have cleaned up their database of nude images. They have also increased measures to guard against future user-generated nudity. It also sounds like they identified an individual (via the UUID) and will be taking “further steps” (click image for full view).

Yesterday’s BeautyMeter article resulted in quite the firestorm. Media outlets such as Fox News, Wired, Gizmodo, DownloadSqaud and others, carried the “Nude 15-Year-Old Pictures” story … as well as social media activity from Digg, Twitter and more.

Today at approximately 12:20 a.m. PST (24 hours after we broke the story), Apple removed BeautyMeter from the App Store … however previous downloads are still fully functional – including access to the infamous 15-year-old nude image seen below (image taken at time of writing, at 12:30 a.m. PST).

15YearOldNudeJuly2FINAL

It seems yesterday was not the first time BeautyMeter had its “issues”. The app launched January 17 and the developers, Braun Software, began approving user generated nude images for public viewing. Then in mid-April, the devs changed their policy, no more nudity. Of course this caused a huge backlash among the rabid middle-aged perverts as they voiced their displeasure via the App Store User Ratings.

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One month later, the perverted old guys (and comment #113’s wife – see above) rejoiced … BeautyMeter boobs were back!

RejoiceFINAL

We’re not exactly sure why Braun Software banned the once acceptable nudity from their app in mid-April … perhaps it was in preparation of submitting Version 1.6 update for approval (kind of like cleaning up shop before the inspector pays a visit), which was accepted by Apple on April 27. Strange behavior by Braun Software.

So the question remains … does Apple allow nudity in the App Store???

If the answer is NO nudity, then why does Apple make available a 17+ rating specifically stating Frequent/Intense Nudity? … why do apps like TOP100 specifically advertise topless models coming soon?

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If the answer is YES nudity, then why would apps like Hottest Girls and BeautyMeter (sans the 15-year-old naked girl) be banned?

Obviously Apple needs to make a decision on their nudity policy and stick with it … indecisions and inconsistencies in business are an absolute killer. We think Sir Winston Churchill summarizes the current state of Apple the best with his 1939 “quotation”:

I cannot forecast to you the action of Apple.
It is a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma

July 2, 2009 | Filed Under News, Social | 326 Comments 

iPhone Porn And Nudity Drama Continues – More Info

(update 3:00pm PST: Hottest Girls web site, AllenTheGeek.com, has posted a note saying: “Apple has now removed all of our apps from the iTunes store without prior warning. We have yet to hear back from them on this issue.” WOW! Allen had a total of 4 apps – Hottest Girls, Hottest Guys, Send Flowers and EliteBrowser… and just like that, DONE!)

(update 11:30am PST: Hottest Girls developer, Allen Leung, has taken down his website  AllenTheGeek,com (only an email address remains). Is Allen on the run from Hottest Girls customers demanding their money back since the app is no longer working? LOL)

HottestGirlsDelete (update 7:00am PST: Hottest Girls received another “update” … when attempting to launch, the app cleverly informs the user, “This version will no longer work. You should delete this version.”)

LOL … who knew iPhone porn could create such drama. This reads something straight out of a soap opera or the Nip/Tuck television series. Pay close attention and follow along …

So early yesterday morning (12:30am PST) we wrote about developer Allen Leung updating his Hottest Girls app with nude topless sexy girl pictures … thus making Apple history by becoming the first iPhone application to contain nudity. Later that morning (9:30am PST), we updated our post stating Apple pulled Hottest Girls from the App Store. Several hours later, CNN quotes Apple spokesman Tom Neumayer:

Apple will not distribute applications that contain inappropriate content, such as pornography. The developer of this application added inappropriate content directly from their server after the application had been approved and distributed, and after the developer had subsequently been asked to remove some offensive content. This was a direct violation of the terms of the iPhone Developer Program. The application is no longer available on the App Store.

Last night (7:30pm PST), TechCrunch speculated that Apple DID NOT pull the app, rather Allen the developer, voluntarily pulled the Hottest Girls app because the high demand was crashing his servers. Allen didn’t exactly say he pulled the app … rather put a marketing spin to the situation, calling the app “Sold Out”.

HottestGirlsSoldOut

WTF is going on with Apple? They are a JOKE with their idiotic, vague and inconsistent App Store policies. Hey Apple … if you will not distribute pornography, then why the hell do you have a 17+ rating that CLEARLY states INTENSE SEXUAL CONTENT or NUDITY?!?! Here’s a brilliant idea, no pornography? – then bail the rating! – DUH!

17rating

Not to mention the TOP100 app … SHOUTING … “Topless Images Will Be Added … End Of June 2009!!!” (oh krapp, there goes their servers too) … with promises of the Covergirl (“100 Photos Of Bums”), Topless Babes (“100 Topless Models) and Cleavage (“100 Photos Of Cleavages) apps arriving from the same TOP100 developer in July.

Top100Desc

CovergirlPornComingSoon

So stay tuned for more dumbass corporate indecisions from Apple as we continue to monitor the iPhone Spice movement and all its idiotic glory.

June 26, 2009 | Filed Under Entertainment, News | 164 Comments 

Porn And Nudity Now Available In The App Store

(update 6/26/09 12:30am PST: yet another update. click here for complete details)

(update 6/25/09 9:33am PST: oh Apple, you BIG TEASE! the revolutionary Hottest Girls app has been pulled from the App Store. perhaps too “hot” for the geeks in Cupertino, LOL)

You knew it was coming! … You read the warning signs! … This shouldn’t be a surprise!
But similar to any historic occasion, the magnitude of the event really starts to sink in after it becomes reality. So chew on this for a moment …

Apple’s iPhone App Store now contains NUDITY!

Here, let us repeat that for you so there is no confusion …

Apple approves NUDITY in iPhone apps!
There is PORNOGRAPHY in the App Store!

Thanks to the new Parental Controls in OS 3.0 (the 17+ rating), yesterday, developer Allen Leung updated his Hottest Girls app with nude topless sexy girl pictures … thus making Apple history by becoming the first iPhone application to contain nudity.

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(image via macenstein)

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LOL … on Monday, Steve Jobs released a company statement characterizing the App Store as “Revolutionary”. Two days later Steve’s prophecy comes true … PORN … indeed  HottestGirlsNudity11 revolutionary Steve!

So now that we can purchase official Apple endorsed nude porno boobies in the App Store, where do we go from here? Streaming videos … an official Vivid Entertainment app … Adam & Eve catalog … Leisure Suit Larry games … iPlayboy … etc. SHHHHH – do you hear that loud roar? … that’s the Girls Gone Wild franchise going wild over the good news.

And now we have questions for Apple: will they be releasing a new SDK agreement and revising Section 3.3.12 and its “applications must not contain any pornographic material” specification? … is hardcore material cool or just soft porn? … what about male frontal nudity? … or POV porn? … HEY – don’t laugh! … these guidelines are crucial to mister Larry “Hustler” Flynt.

iPlayboy

So on this historic day … we’ll leave you with a tip and a warning:

iPhoneParentalControls11 TIP – parents, if you don’t want your kids to view Apple’s porn (if you do – you’re an IDIOT), go to Settings > General > Restrictions > Enable Restrictions, check Don’t Allow Apps 17+.

WARNING – similar to the fart and bikini girl phenomena, brace yourselves for a massive flood of iPhone porno applications.

Hmmm … those poor Korean secretaries we wrote about … who were forced to pose in the Office Girls app – we guess completely disrobing will now be part of their job security.

(LOL at geeky Apple approved pornography – it probably sucks anyways! – save your $$$)

June 25, 2009 | Filed Under Entertainment | 151 Comments