In case you lack Hangman skills, the iPhone application pictured above reads … Penis Enlargement – Enlarge Your Penis Effortlessly With Hypnosis.
This free app promises that with just the touch of a button, you’ll add size and girth to your penis … all through the magic of hypnotherapy. Simply listen to the 3 minute audio contained within the application and your penis grows bigger. Pretty amazing stuff … hooray!
Plus you’ll receive a wonderful icon which boldly screams “PENIS ENLARGEMENT” which you can proudly display on your iPhone … double hooray!
Unlike the other “grow your penis” application we featured last week, Penis Enlargement actually contains some value.
As a courtesy to our viewers, we’ve put together a highlight reel … a compilation of the app’s peak moments (so to speak). Trust us … you do not want to miss this! So TURN UP the volume and push play … your penis will thank us later.
Last year we featured the hysterically epic Pee Monkey Jungle Fire [iTunes $0.99] application … the first peeing action game on the iPhone. In Jungle Fire, you play the role of a male monkey … the jungle is on fire and you must save the Gee Monkeys (sexy lady monkeys) from burning to death. How? By pissing on those nasty destructive flames … of course.
Since the launch of Jungle Fire, developer Happy Latte has released two additional Pee Monkey games … the former #1 chart-topping Pee Monkey Toilet Trainer [iTunes $0.99] and Toilet Trainer 2 [iTunes $1.99]. But hold on … Happy Latte continues to piss away … just last week, Pee Monkey is back in an all-new adventure … Pee Monkey Plant Bloom [iTunes $0.99 & FREE Lite].
In Plant Bloom, Pee Monkey is challenged with growing plants … by showering them with nutritious monkey urine. Each plant Pee Monkey successfully soaks in his whiz, blooms into a beautiful flower (yellow sunflowers – makes sense) and earns points. There are 40 levels (10 in Lite version) of brain-teasing fluid mechanics … each with increasing in difficulty, as Pee Monkey must try to “water” an increasing number of plants without exhausting his … ummm … resources.
Similar to the previous Pee Monkey games, Plant Bloom boasts family-friendly graphics, smooth realistic gameplay and user-friendly game controls … overall a high-quality top-notch iPhone game which can be enjoyed by players of all ages (game rated 4+). Think Angry Birds with the joys of golden showers … Pee Monkey rocks!
In case you missed any of our perfect iPhone chaos, quick links to this week’s articles.
November 15: LOL Collection Of Hilarious iPhone-Related Cartoons
November 20: The Power Of Sushi – Does It Sell iPhone Apps?
When Star Wars Collides With Disney Princesses
What do you get when you cross Star Wars with a Disney Princess? Epic mashups by deviantART member JosephB222. Click here for more Sith Princesses by Joseph.
Darth Snow White
The app’s description certainly sounds erotic … “sensual” – “delights” – “lips” – “sexy soundtrack” …
Presenting the most elegant and sensual culinary delights you ever had the pleasure of wrapping your lips around…
Features a sexy soundtrack featuring a user-controlled real-time dynamic audio equalization.
But come on … is Sushi Better Than Sex … really? No seriously … REALLY?
In honor of the much anticipated “Green Lantern” movie trailer (how’s that for buzz – even the trailer is being anticipated) debuting today in theaters with the premiere of “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1” (name = annoying) … we proudly present the Green Lantern iOS 4 iPhone 4 wallpaper combo-pack.
Get ready now for next summer’s blockbuster “Green Lantern” movie (arriving June 17, 2011) by downloading this super sexy lock screen wallpaper … along with the matching home screen version.
Oh – and if you’re not planning to see the new Harry Potter film, check out the “Green Lantern” trailer below, shown earlier this week on Entertainment Tonight … should be epic!
[Download directly to iPhone’s camera roll by touching the image, press and hold the image on its new page and select save]
B.M. Worldwide (aka Brand Ambassador Group) is an iPhone application publishing company … and a stellar one at that! Their list of App Store contributions are quite impressive:
– Plants vs. Zombies knock-off … “Zombies vs. Bushes”
– Angry Birds knock-off … “The Angry Bird”
– Super hero sex app … “Super Hero Sex”
– A non-functioning “Coffee Warmer” app
– A penis enlargement app … “iGrow Male Enhancement”
– Tons of 5th grade programming level soundboards
B.M. Worldwide has about 50 applications for sale … with an average rating of 1.5 stars and typical user comments as seen below …
Basically every app from B.M. Worldwide should be featured here on KRAPPS … enough material to cover the next 3 months. But rather than play favorites … we’ll just leave you with some eye candy, courtesy of B.M. Worldwide’s … Pocket Boyfriend – Stan The Man.
Did you know you can grow bigger boobs by using your iPhone? Yes you can! A wonderful application called Breast Enlargement Project [click here for our review] promises bigger boobs in just 10 days … hooray!
And not to be outdone by its female enhancement counterpart … the penis is happy as it now has an enlargement project as well … iGrow – Male Enhancement.
For only $5, iGrow gives results … adds length and girth to your penis … grows 1-4 inches in week! And even better, Apple appropriately rated it 9+ … so even 3rd graders can grow their unit.
iGrow reads like one of those ridiculous late night infomercials …
This app will give you guaranteed results in just a few weeks!
This is the app that will truly change your life!
Girls will love it and you will be talk of the town!
It will be the best $ that you’ve ever spent!
“Dear Mr. Jobs … I am requesting a refund in the amount of $4.99 to my iTunes account as the iGrow Male Enhancement iPhone application failed to deliver its guaranteed results. Since the developer did not include refund instructions, please find the attached pictures of my penis which clearly shows no growth in length or girth. If further proof is required, I am available to provide this evidence in-person. Thank you for your attention in this matter.”
But alas, as iTunes user Zanderil points out … save your money and just Google it!