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- Get Your Shit Together Apple – Hooters App Approved, Banned, Re-Approved, Re-Banned
- “This Is My Gift To All Current And Future iPhone Users” – Fart Dialer
- Determined To Bring Sexy Back, Developer Forced To Publish ‘I Love Burgers’ Fetish App
- Overtly Sexual Apps Return – Apple Fails To Enforce New Policy?
- Recap: Week Of March 1 – plus App Star Awards 2nd Edition
- Go Ask Alice: Alice’s Adventures – Rabbit Hole Of Death iPhone Game
- Abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz iPhone App – Why Didn’t We Think Of That?
- Star Walk App – Because Having The Entire Universe On Your iPhone Is Freakin’ Cool
- Amazing Dirty Sex City Names For iPhone – Really, Really Bad (Names)
- Poker Vs. Strong Female Role Models App – Result Of Apple’s ‘Overtly Sexual’ Policy
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Get Your Shit Together Apple – Hooters App Approved, Banned, Re-Approved, Re-Banned
We reported in great detail Apple’s recent war on smut apps … over 5,000 “overtly sexual” applications removed, virtually shutting down the entire niche. Now any time you wipe out such a large number of targets, there’s bound to be some collateral damage. Innocent bystanders like the swimwear shopping application Simply Beach … the 12+ rated iPhone game Daisey Mae’s Alien Buffet … and the photo manipulation app Wobble … were all banned for having “overtly sexual” content. Only they did not. Apple realized their mistakes and quickly reinstated these offerings.
Which brings us to today’s “WTF Moment”, courtesy of Apple …
Hooters is an American restaurant chain that’s been around for about 30 years. Their specialties are chicken wings and attractive waitresses dressed in white tank tops and orange runner’s shorts. Like any savvy business, Hooters had a number of officially licensed iPhone applications available in the App Store.
On The Go Girls was one of the developers that partnered with Hooters and published the Hooters’ Calendar Sexy Screen Wash app. The app was released on January 21 and it quickly broke into the Top 100 of its category. So things were going great … until a month later, on February 18, D-Day for smut apps … Apple banned Hooters’ Calendar Sexy Screen Wash. In addition to their Hooters application, Apple removed all 50 applications from On The Go Girls … completely shutting them down and destroying their sole source of income.
But wait! Apple realized that removing the all-American Hooters app was a mistake … and a week later, on February 25, Hooters’ Calendar Sexy Screen Wash was re-approved for sale (with no change to its original content). Obviously a wise decision by Apple since the app skyrocketed into its category’s Top 25.
But wait! In typical bonehead fashion … less than two weeks later, Apple changed their mind once again and yesterday re-banned Hooters’ Calendar Sexy Screen Wash.
Seriously, this is getting ridiculous. Approved … Banned … Approved … Banned. Apple is acting like a neurotic pregnant woman. And why the re-ban? Allegedly Apple received numerous customer complaints about the Hooters app. LMAO … yeah, because Hooters Girls are so much more offensive than the ladies appearing in the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit or Playboy applications (currently available for sale).
After the first ban, Fred Clarke, co-founder of On The Go Girls, stated in a New York Times interview (that Apple’s censorship), “goes farther than sexy content. For developers, how do you know you aren’t going to invest thousands into a business only to find out one day you’ve been cut off?”
Well Mr. Clarke probably should have taken his own advice. Speaking with him yesterday, he said, “We were reenergized when Apple reinstated our Hooters app and invested $5,000 for related development of the product line … only to be informed the app has been banned a second time. It’s a severe blow to our business, but we look forward to the challenge of succeeding in the App Store once again.”
Damn Fred! Is your glass always half-full? Are you always this happy-go-lucky? It’s ok to say it bro … repeat after us … FFFFUUU APPLE! Dude, not even the Double Jeopardy Clause in the US Constitution could save your ass from Apple. But then again, it should come as no surprise … this is Apple’s world, we just live in it.
[please note: while the above details the proceedings of the twice banned screen wash app … two other Hooters-themed applications have a similar saga – Hooters Calendar Girls Slideshow and 2010 Hooters Calendar Video.]
Overtly Sexual Apps Return – Apple Fails To Enforce New Policy?
As we reported three weeks ago, Apple went on a massive rampage of sex-oriented app removals. Without any advance warning … Apple banned over 5,000 applications during the course of 72 hours. This sweep of the App Store is Apple’s most significant effort in their war on smut apps, resulting in hundreds of developers’ livelihoods taken away. Apple delivered a serious and clear message … applications that contain “overtly sexual” content will not be tolerated.
After making such a strong and well publicized anti-sex app statement, you would assume Apple would err on the side of caution regarding any future sex-oriented applications. But we should all be familiar with the whole “Ass” out of “U” and “Me” thing.
Just three weeks after 5,000 smut apps were banished, Apple approved the myCupcakes and myBuns applications (both paid and free versions of each), by Bangin Apps. And while cupcakes and buns might seem like wholesome subject matters, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out the true meaning behind these code names … tits and ass.
Bangin Apps, is no stranger to the App Store. Prior to Apple’s change of smut policy, they enjoyed two highly successful releases … myBoobs and myBooty. Both apps were ranked in the Entertainment category’s Top 100 and positioned as flagship products.
In attempt to follow Apple’s new guidelines, Bangin Apps re-skinned myBoobs and myBooty with new names and preview screenshots. However the content of the apps remains the same … tits and ass. And wouldn’t you know it, Apple approved the four “overtly sexual” apps with no delays whatsoever. Like their predecessors, myCupcakes and myBuns are climbing the charts … with myCupcakes already in the Top 100 of its category.
We doubt Apple reversed their policy once again … allowing “overtly sexual” handbra and dental floss covered ass images. We emailed Bangin Apps and are waiting for a reply … how did myCupcakes and myBuns apps bust through Apple’s no smut policy? Since these applications do not store pictures in-app, rather content is delivered via a server … our guess is that at the time of review, Apple never saw any of the scantly clad female images which the app currently contains.
But come on … did Apple really think myCupcakes and myBuns would contain a bunch of pastry and cake images? As discussed, Apple should err on the side of caution … cupcakes and buns … DUH!
Recap: Week Of March 1 – plus App Star Awards 2nd Edition
In case you missed any of our perfect iPhone chaos, quick links to this week’s articles.
March 1: Exclusive: Steve Jobs And Bill Gates Turn Guido!
March 2: Poker Vs. Strong Female Role Models App – Result Of Apple’s ‘Overtly Sexual’ Policy
March 3: Amazing Dirty Sex City Names For iPhone – Really, Really Bad (Names)
March 4: Star Walk App – Because Having The Entire Universe On Your iPhone Is Freakin’ Cool
March 5: Abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz iPhone App – Why Didn’t We Think Of That?
March 6: Go Ask Alice: Alice’s Adventures – Rabbit Hole Of Death iPhone Game
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App Star Awards 2nd Edition
(aka – I Listen To Bands That Don’t Even Exist Yet)
Never mind the Oscars (da shame, snubbing The Hangover and Zombieland), we have some real awards news. Coming soon is the 2nd edition of the App Star Awards. What’s killer about these awards is that it’s totally unique … one-of-a-kind … different. Unlike other iPhone app awards, App Star Awards discovers and rewards brilliant upcoming apps … apps that don’t even exist yet (or at least not in the App Store). Like we said … totally unique – totally cool. Pay attention to the App Star Awards for valuable insights and previews of upcoming applications that promise to be awesome.
Any app can be included for consideration (just as long as it hasn’t been submitted to Apple by March 26 … and no jailbreak apps). Developers can already begin to pre-register their app(s) … while regular submissions begin March 21.
The App Star Awards 2 is partnering with 360iDev (one of the largest iPhone developer events in the United States) and winners will be announced on stage at the conference (April 12 in San Jose, CA).
This year’s App Star Awards should be way better than last year’s … mainly because we’ll be participating in the event – HA! Yeah, we’ll be part of the judging crew … checking out the 30 “final round” apps (which don’t even exist yet) and voting for our three faves … top three vote getters will be declared the winners.
Anyways … we’re totally stoked to be part of the App Star Awards festivities and looking forward to checking out some kick ass apps. Stay tuned to KRAPPS for App Star Awards updates … and for complete details, see the event’s site at http://appsfire.com/appstar2/ .
Poker Vs. Strong Female Role Models App – Result Of Apple’s ‘Overtly Sexual’ Policy
Ladies and gentlemen … the story you are about to read is true. The facts have NOT been changed to protect the innocent.
Headlight Software has been in business since 1997 … creating high quality utilities and web-based services. With over 13 million downloads, their first product, GetRight, remains one of the premiere download managers on the market. In 2008, the company began developing iPhone apps with FTP On The Go (a direct descendant of GetRight) as their inaugural release. Since then, they have branched out into games and other utilities.
Although Headlight Software is a reputable, well-established publisher … their sole “lighthearted” app fell victim to Apple’s recent war on smut apps. Apple deemed the Poker vs. Girls app “overtly sexual” and it was removed from sale. Poker vs. Girls was one of the many strip poker games available for download in iTunes … containing images of girls in lingerie … pretty much the exact same thing you will find in the Victoria’s Secret All Access application (currently available for download).
So realizing it was time to nut up or shut up (love that movie), Headlight Software chose the former and released a polar opposite version of the “overtly sexual” Poker vs. Girls. As a matter of fact, this new poker app is somewhat inspirational … Poker vs. Strong Female Role Models.
LMAO … indeed, nothing sexy about playing no limit Texas Hold’em Poker against fully dressed career women … who stay clothed no matter win, lose or draw. Choose from eight different professional females … a Doctor, Fighter Pilot, App Developer, Mathematician and more. And just to play it completely safe (never know with Apple’s arbitrary standards), Headlight Software chose to go the total no flesh route with a Burka-wearing female as their icon.
So here’s the deal folks … if you’re looking for some steamy strip poker action for your iPhone, Poker vs. Strong Female Role Models is about as close (and we use the term loosely) as you’ll get in Apple’s new squeaky-clean, brand protected App Store. Unless of course a well-known company like Playboy, Maxim, FHM or Hooters decides to publish one. But until then … nut up or shut up … learn to love the Burka!
Poker vs. Strong Female Role Models (damn we love that name) is a free download [iTunes Free] with two strong female role model opponents available for play. The remaining six strong female role models can be unlocked, but NOT undressed, for only 99 cents. Again … nut up or shut up!
Apple’s New ‘Overtly Sexual’ Policy Becomes Butt Of Joke [Comic]
For the past week, there’s been a lot of media coverage regarding Apple’s war on smut and the removal of over 5,000 “overtly sexual” applications from the App Store. We thought it’s time to lighten the mood and get a breath of fresh air by sharing this comic from The Joy Of Tech. LOL … enjoy!
Wobble iBoobs Back On Sale For Your Jiggling Pleasures!
Yesterday in our “The Comedy Of Errors – Starring Apple” article, we reported that after realizing their mistakes, Apple reinstated two previously banned apps … Simply Beach and Daisey Mae’s Alien Buffet. These two apps were originally collateral damage in Apple’s war against smut apps.
Well it looks like Apple has corrected a couple of other OOOPS-ies. Yesterday Apple reinstated six previously banned Hooters apps, including the Hooters Calendar Screen Wash app we highlighted by publisher On The Go Girls.
And just now, we received word, that the once banned Wobble iBoobs and Wobble iBoobs (Premium) apps are now available for sale on the App Store. Well sort of … looks like there was a slight tweak in the app’s title … no iBoobs. Guess it’s less “overtly sexual” this way.
Stay tuned to KRAPPS as we’ll keep you abreast (see what we did there?) to any further developments in iSexGate 2010.
The Comedy Of Errors – Starring Apple
As previously reported, Apple finally broke their silence regarding last weekend’s massive removal of “overtly sexual” apps … “It came to the point where we were getting customer complaints from women who found the content getting too degrading and objectionable, as well as parents who were upset with what their kids were able to see,” Philip W. Schiller said in an interview with The New York Times.
Uh, ok. But what about apps like Playboy, Sports Illustrated Swimsuit, FHM, Maxim and others … these definitely contain “overtly sexual” content which kids should not view … why did Apple look the other way and not ban these apps? … “The difference is this is a well-known company with previously published material available broadly in a well-accepted format,” Schiller said. ERROR … translation – although these magazine apps contain titillating content, they will provide Apple a significant revenue stream from magazine subscriptions via the iPad once it arrives.
Uh, ok. But why did Apple ban a legitimate retailer’s online shopping application … Simply Beach … which sells bathing suits and rated 4+? ERROR … Apple made a mistake and they realized it. So without a word, not even to the publisher, Simply Beach mysteriously reappeared back on the App Store.
Uh, ok. But what about the 12+ rated game, Daisey Mae’s Alien Buffet … why was it pulled from the App Store? ERROR … once again, realizing their mistake, Apple reinstated Daisey Mae. Oh, and of course no word from Apple to the developer that their game was once again live (seems to be a common theme with Apple, this no communication thing).
Uh, ok. But yesterday, after Apple’s new “no smut apps allowed” policy … why did they approve the Girls Of Break.com app with its dental floss bikinis and bare asses images? ERROR … unless we missed the memo, Break.com is not “a well-known company with previously published material available broadly in a well-accepted format.”
Uh, ok. So Apple is cleaning up the App Store ahead of the iPad’s launch, which they are hoping to promote as a device for families and schools … yet the following Five Secrets app iTunes preview screenshot is approved for all ages to view? ERROR … trust us, it doesn’t matter how “well-known” the company is, no school will allow their students to read such a graphic description.
LOL …. Shakespeare could not have written it better.
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