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Apple Continues War On Smut – Apps Rejected Due To Screenshots
About two weeks ago, we reported that Apple began a massive App Store sweep by removing once approved smut applications. Apple stated these apps were banished due to customer complaints for inappropriate content (showing too much skin). While the exact criteria for “too much skin” is unknown, pasties and hand bra apps were the biggest casualties … currently there are none left in the store. Apple’s reversal in policy came without notice, completely blindsiding developers.
And it doesn’t end there … the blindsiding smut clean up continues. Applications are now being rejected for displaying objectionable preview screenshots. Below is the email Apple is currently sending developers, informing them that … “the application screenshots must meet the requirements for a 4+ rating since these images are visible on the App Store by all users even when purchasing is restricted by the application’s rating.”
Thank you for submitting your application to the App Store. Unfortunately, xxxxx xxxxxx cannot be posted to the App Store at this time because the screenshots provided contain content that is objectionable for certain age groups. This is in violation of Section 3.3.14 from the iPhone Developer Program License Agreement that states:
"Applications may be rejected if they contain content or materials of any kind (text, graphics, images, photographs, sounds, etc.) that in Apple’s reasonable judgment may be found objectionable, for example, materials that may be considered obscene, pornographic, or defamatory."
The application screenshots must meet the requirements for a 4+ rating (no objectionable material) since these images are visible on the App Store by all users even when purchasing is restricted by the application’s rating. The inappropriate images have been attached for your reference.
While your iTunes Connect Application State is displayed as Rejected, it is not necessary to upload a new binary. Once you have made the necessary modifications, please reply to this email and we will proceed with your application review.
Sincerely,
iPhone App Review Team
Interesting that Ars Technica, The Big Money and Fraser Speirs all had recent articles identifying the problem of soft-core pornography being visible in the App Store. KRAPPS has also covered the matter in our “iTunes – Featuring Sexually Explicit Descriptions For All To Read” and “App Descriptions Gone Wild” articles. So perhaps Apple is listening … yet they have a LONG way to go. Just today, a pair of Yau’s Asian Boobs applications were approved with the following screenshots …
And of course there’s plenty of non 4+ rated screenshots in the Lifestyle section of the App Store … everything from the Amateur Thongs screenshots to Caribbean Sex Fantasies (do app names also fall under the 4+ rating scrutiny? are those girls twins?).
Oh … since Apple now approves sex position apps, they’ll have to deal with the 69 Positions app, iKamasutra and many more.
At the current rate, 4+ rated screenshots seems like a tall order for Apple to fulfill, especially given Apple’s history of inconsistent policy enforcement . But perhaps some day pre-schoolers will be able to peruse the App Store without being enlightened to the benefits of the Missionary position. Gee, here’s an idea … program the parental controls to disable not only the purchasing, but also viewing of restricted apps in iTunes. Come on Apple … if you can make an iPad, certainly you can handle this bit of programming … it’s all about being revolutionary, right?
Sports Smut – The Latest App Store Sexploitation
When it comes to smut, it seems no stone has been left unturned in the App Store. Name your sleaze and chances are there’s an app for that. College Babes … Asian Boobs … MILFs … Porn Stars … Panties, Stockings, Thongs and Lingerie … Emo Chicks … Sexy Amateurs … just a few examples of the thousands of smut apps available for download.
While we try not to judge what floats your boat, these next three apps made us laugh out loud – too freaking tacky. Obviously not much is off-limits when it comes to Apple making a buck … including the sexploitation of Olympic, professional and college female athletes for your perverted pleasure. Bravo … the App Store now contains Sports Smut.
Adult Sexy Gymnast
Nice attempted save with the “Adult” descriptor. With a large percentage of girls under the age of 18 who compete in gymnastics, this app is perfect for those sick morons who give candy to little girls and watch the Summer Olympics for one reason … tight uniforms.
iSpiedOnVolleyballGirls
Not only does the title alone make us feel dirty and cheap … but the tunnel vision butt shots furthers the creepiness. And you gotta love the app’s description … “17+ ONLY CONTENT” … “EXTREME CANDID SHOTS” … “FANTASTIC BOTTOMS” … “FACINATING POSES” … “NASTIEST user submitted pics” … “GET EXCITED by hot images taken on INDOOR playground”. We’re still talking about volleyball, right? Could’ve sworn we were downloading the Girls Of Glitter Gulch application.
Adult Tennis Boobs
Now we’ll be the first to admit that there are some smokin’ hot women tennis players … but dammit son, CONTROL YOURSELF! Seriously, can’t a girl just play tennis without ending up in a smut app? Hmmm … Anna Kournikova, Maria Sharapova, Maria Kirilenko, Ana Ivanovic, Victoria Azarenka and many more … ok, well maybe we’re being too harsh on Adult Tennis Boobs – we’ll let it slide <hee, hee>.
Celebrate Self-Mutilation With The Rate My Piercing App
Ok, let’s get one thing straight, KRAPPS is not a psychology site … nor do we pretend to be one on TV. But if you haven’t noticed, we’ve made some keen observations regarding human nature in many of our previous articles. Sex sells … farts are funny … shaking a baby to death is not funny.
Today we’d like to discuss another aspect of human nature … people crave to be accepted. In many ways, the App Store is a reflection of life (sorry to get all Zen on you). Just look at all the applications available where people are seeking the approval of others … Rate My Girlfriend, Rate My Car, Rate My Puppy, Rate My Picture and hundreds more.
The premise of these “Rate” apps is simple … users upload a picture and the community gives their approval/disapproval by a voting system. But be careful … the voting tends to be brutally honest. If you suck, they’ll let you know … a thousand times over. Most of these apps are pretty mainstream … come on, who doesn’t want to rate picture after picture after picture of adorable puppies or some dude’s squeeze?
But all these “Rate” apps pale in comparison to our favorite … or what we like to call “The Pocket Freak Show” … Rate My Piercing.
Rate My Piercing is a celebration of life … the part of life which possesses you to poke holes in your body. It’s like a virtual punk rock show … a Sex Pistols or Dead Kennedys concert conveniently in your pocket. Emos will appreciate Rate My Piercing as well … plenty of black-haired, heavy eyeliner, pierced to the max emo chicks available to rate.
And after hours of “research”, we are happy to report we did not come across a single Prince Albert … although surely a Janet Jackson Nipplegate image would vault the rather obscure Rate My Piercing into Super Bowl-like popularity in comparison to its App Store peers. We’ll keep checking.
Exclusive – Peyton Manning Seen Using iPhone App During Super Bowl
The Indianapolis Colts and New Orleans Saints played in Super Bowl XLIV (that’s “44” for the Roman numerically challenged) yesterday and damn … what a helluv a football game. The Colts took a quick 10-0 lead, but ultimately it was the Saints who fought back and won in thrilling fashion, 31-17. Congrats to the Saints for their first-ever Super Bowl triumph!
Now while most of the media attention was focused on the Saints gutsy play calling (who starts the second half with an onside kick … that’s ridiculously awesome) and come-from-behind victory, KRAPPS took a different approach … we were busy attempting to discover iPhone-related Super Bowl news. And that we did …
Just after Indianapolis Colts quarterback, Peyton Manning, made a critical mistake late in the fourth quarter … throwing an interception that was returned for a touchdown … he was seen on the bench using his iPhone. Below is our exclusive picture of this “Manning iPhone” moment.
After the game, we used our super-duper computer to enhance the image and discovered Manning was actually using an iPhone app … below is the video footage.
LMAO … yes folks, just moments after his game turning interception, Manning cried out for help with the I Am Choking app and its amazing voice talent.
Now we don’t know how effective I Am Choking is during an actual medical emergency (guess we’ll try it out next time we’re choking … assuming we have the presence of mind to grab our iPhone while we turn blue – yeah right) … but this app certainly serves a purpose in the sporting world for athletes and fans alike.
Recap: Week Of February 1 – plus Big Sale On These iPhone Games
In case you missed any of our perfect iPhone chaos, quick links to this week’s articles.
February 1: Smell Like Ass? The iPhone Can Help!
February 2: I Just Made Love – Use The iPhone To Tell The World Where You’ve Had Sex
February 3: Dad Gives Baby His iPhone As A Teether – Why?
February 4: Sorority Pillow Fights App – Must Resist!
February 5: Lusting After Armpits? Satisfy Your Needs With The Pits App!
February 6: LED Football For iPhone – Flashing Blips Excite Us
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Super Bowl Sale – Great Deals On Four Football Games
We figure since many of you are in the mood for some football, we’d give you a quick heads up … there are some great bargains today on a few football games. These deals are only good for today … Super Bowl Sunday … so jump on them quick!
LED Football by touchGrove [iTunes] $0.99 –> FREE: This old school classic from 1978 is officially licensed by Mattel and plays awesome on the iPhone. Check out our review of LED Football 2 … but only after you downloaded the original version for FREE.
Flick Kick Field Goal by PikPok [iTunes] $0.99 –> FREE: Sort of like the kick-ass iPhone game, Paper Toss, but in a football kind of way. Don’t let the FREE price fool you … this game is all quality and wisely includes online leaderboards via OpenFeint.
NFL 2010 by Gameloft [iTunes] $2.99 –> $0.99: This officially licensed NFL game was launched back in August for $7.99. Today only … 99 cents. Gameloft is a high quality publisher, so expect an extremely solid game. At less than a buck … just do it.
Madden NFL 10 by EA Sports [iTunes] $6.99 –> $4.99: Put it this way … everything EA publishes is golden. Madden is also officially licensed by the NFL and like most EA titles, sits in the Top 50 Paid Apps. Final motivation … $4.99 is the LOWEST EVER price for this game.
LED Football For iPhone – Flashing Blips Excite Us (free this weekend)
(written by guest author Tim Giron. follow Tim on Twitter @timgiron)
Good evening sports fans and welcome to this, the LED Football 2 [iTunes $0.99] championship game. The blips are taking the field and we are anxiously anticipating the return of one of the brightest blips to ever grace this game: your quarterback. And what an up and down season he has had, folks. Who can forget his daring run to victory in LED Football? Once he had committed to running forward, there was no way he was able to fall back. You’ve gotta admire the gutsy determination that it took to score against those odds. And then, of course, there were those that said his career was finished amidst the rumors of retirement during the off-season.
But now, in LED Football 2, he’s back for more. And he’s teaming up with that flashy blip, the razzle dazzle receiver, for a decidedly more potent offense. Just when those dim blips on defense think they have shut him down, he’s able to fire a pass downfield for the first down or even an amazing touchdown run. And this new fancy footwork is a thing of beauty also, folks. The way he fades back a little to bait the defense, just waiting for an opening. It’s like he’s playing a brand new game! One with all of the features that you remember (except the nine volt battery) and it’s fully licensed from Mattel, Inc., by the developer, touchGrove.
In addition to LED Football [iTunes] and LED Football 2 [iTunes], touchGrove also has LED Basketball [iTunes] already available in the App Store and LED Baseball in the works. At just 99 cents each, these nuggets of nostalgia are easy on the lunch money as well.
FREE iPhone App – LED FOOTBALL
[Editor’s Note: So here’s the scoop … there’s this sort of big football game going on tomorrow where it costs $3 million for a 30 second advertising spot – BARGAIN. In honor of the companies that spend this insane amount of money, the folks at touchGrove decided it would be cool to price their version 1 LED Football at zero/free. Go ahead, don’t be shy … CLICK HERE to download LED Football for FREE. Heck, why not … all you young punks could learn a thing or two about videogaming history and how good you freaking have it these days. Modern Warfare 2, Madden 10, Halo 3 … hell, back in the late 70’s they got excited over flashing blips on a black screen as Tim described above. So yeah, show some freaking appreciation … download LED Football … and thank KRAPPS, you’ll never take your current videogames for granted again!]
Lusting After Armpits? Satisfy Your Needs With The Pits App!
Since it’s our job to report on the outer edges of the App Store, we come across a lot of really weird shit. And we’re not just talking farts, zits, vomit or boobs … those apps are totally tame compared to some of the subject matters we’ve seen. Got a fetish for old folks … check out the Sexy GrandMa app. Enjoy lusting after hammered chicks who are about to blow chow … iDrunken Girls is the app for you. Does hearing the 26 letters of the alphabet spoken in a sexual manner turn you on … then listen to the Sexy Alphabet app.
And the news keeps getting better for all you creeps … the fine folks at Keyvisuals have released something right in your wheelhouse. Raise your arms – it’s time to celebrate your new freak app … The Pits.
OMG … how did you know! Armpits … we love ‘em! It’s like we’ve died and gone to Heaven. Hundreds of armpits … all shapes, colors and sizes. Right there, conveniently on the iPhone for our viewing pleasure. Can you say … SEXY?!?
Love it? Honestly … we’ve never met an armpit we didn’t like … so naturally we just adore The Pits. Hopefully Keyvisuals will provide scratch and sniff functionality in a future update.
Oh … and pay no attention to the iTunes review below from Merk24 … dude just doesn’t know SEXY, but he does know LAME.
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